Humour Books

Big Thoughts For Little Thinkers

ALWAYS THINK BIG!It is not the job of a parent to pick their child up when they fall, it is their job to teach their child how to get up for themselves. Just as it is not a parent's job to teach their child what to think but rather how to think, how to question the daily interactions and encounters of the life they have ahead of them and how to value the morality within those interactions.This book is my attempt to encourage children towards a lifelong journey of critical thinking and sow the seeds of wider philosophical principals to the next generation of big thinkers. This book deals with the principles of self-esteem self-respect, racial and religious tolerance, success, love, friendship and many more values and virtue that a well rounded forward thinker may wish to consider.We live in a world where we often hold ourselves to other people's standards. Be it beauty, success, happiness or wealth, we tend to look outwardly for confirmation of our achievements and we forget to question why we do things that way at all. It is my hope to illuminate the possibility that perhaps we have what we need to feel successful or beautiful or happy within ourselves already and it is only our perception of those things that we need to change.Keep asking questions,Keep wondering why.And remember to always THINK BIG!This book is intended to introduce children to philosophy and critical thinking as well as to encourage self-confidence and self-love. It also serves as a fun way to begin conversations between children and adults on some of life's bigger questions.I thank you for your interest and hope you enjoy the book.From the Back CoverThe brain is a magical, marvelous thing,And though it looks small there is plenty,Of room for a lifetime of wondrous thoughts,So please, don't just leave it half empty.Fill it with puzzling and pondering and pressing,And questions and quandaries and queries.Fill it with laughter and learning and love,Theological thinking and theories.Question your reasons, imagine ideas,Make knowledge your business to know.With every new sort of wondrous thought,Your brains will continue to grow.This book's not instructions on how you should live,Or a rule book of what you must do.It's just a few thoughts for you to explore,To help form your own point of view.So read it with caution, don't take it as fact.Then ask yourself, do I agree?Put it back on your shelf, then decide for yourself,What kind of you, YOU want to be.What people are saying about Big Thoughts for Little Thinkers:"How does someone fit SO much positivity in one book? Big Thoughts for Little Thinkers is a fabulously quirky meander through a broad range of topics, from celebrating difference to learning from our mistakes, casting off our worries and inspiring others with good deeds. Daniel Thompson's whimsically intelligent rhymes are an engaging blend of poetry, mindfulness and life-coaching that will provide any parent with a powerful toolkit to support their Little Thinkers in considering important issues including self worth, the importance of kindness and having control of our emotional response."Thom Craigen, Author "I think this book should be in every child's permanent collection. A book which they can read again and again, to reinforce what is really important in this life. I wish I could have read this to my children when they were little, but I think we can all learn from these lovely little poems whatever age we are.I've been trying the think which poem is my favourite, but I honestly can't choose. Big Thoughts for Little Thinkers and big thinkers alike!Beautifully written and beautifully illustrated. I highly recommend!Chataboutbooks.blog

Tongue Twisters for Kids

"Rubber baby buggy bumpers" - Say this three times as fast as you can. How about, try saying " Loopy lizards lying lazily aloft a little lane of logs," without messing up. This Tongue Twister book is huge collection of funny phrases, ridiculous rhymes, and silly sentences that will have kids laughing for hours. Each one challenges your mouth muscles as you try to say these tongue twisters faster and multiple times. A tongue twister is a phrase that is supposed to be difficult to articulate properly. Often times they take practice to say correctly. Tongue twisters are good practice for children as they learn to form words, phrases, and vowels. It's hard to say a tongue twister without a smile on your face. Each tongue twister in this book has it's own silly illustration. Kids will be entertained with these tongue twisters for hours.

Down on Love (Welcome to Marsden Book 1)

Welcome to Marsden...where every resident has an opinion about whom you should date. And will share it with you. Even if you don’t ask.Georgiana Down isn’t interested in romance, thank you very much. Newly single after escaping a toxic, emotionally abusive ex, George is perfectly happy being alone, running her successful blog, Down on Love, where she gives gloves-off advice to the lovelorn. And baking the occasional pie as, you know, therapy. When her sister Sera wages a campaign to get her to return to their small hometown of Marsden, a place George had fled fifteen years earlier, it’s the last thing George wants to do. But the pull of family is strong...and no one ever truly escapes the eccentric, insular, odd little town in the heart of New York’s Catskill Mountains. Maybe she can cope if she avoids gossipy neighbors...and one particular Marsden resident who broke her heart years ago...Casey Bowen would know George Down’s unusual pink car anywhere...but he never expected to see it tearing through the streets of Marsden long after George left town and never looked back. Casey manages to escape with his toes intact, but his heart is another matter. As a teenager, Casey had been fascinated by the ethereal, mysterious George, but he never made a move on his friend’s younger sister...until one fateful night....After that, everything went sideways, and George and Casey went on to live very different lives.Now they’re both back in Marsden, both single...and the attraction is still there. George and Casey could have a second chance at happiness...as long as their meddling neighbors don’t screw everything up.Welcome to Marsden—the perfect place to fall in love!Down on Love #1Picture This #2Lucky for You #3

Pigs Can Fly! (Childrens Books): childrens books 2-7 (Giggletastic stories Book 6)

Pigs Can Actually Fly! And when everyone finds out, it’s still hard to believe, would you believe it?Don’t waste a second thinking, join Joshua McManus on one of his delightful, unusual and exciting tales of all.

Illustrated Would You Rather?: Jokes and Game Book for Children Age 5-11 (Silly Kids and Family Scenarios 1)

Looking for a perfect gift book with JOKES, SECRET GAME, AND ILLUSTRATIONS? Here you go!Would you rather swim faster than a shark; or speak in the voice of any person; or have a magical giant flying dragon; or create an odd superhero—Broccoliman? With this book, the options are limitless.Boys and girls of all ages love miracles. This book is full of magical creatures. Among them are dinosaurs, giant sea monsters, weird beasts, smart, friendly, and rare animals.The main hero of this book tries unusual hobbies, breaks sports records, visits remote countries, tastes strange meals, solves dangerous puzzles, and finds himself in the shoes of his favorite cartoon characters.As kids choose WOULD YOU RATHER crazy scenarios, they're sure to get the giggles! Moreover, every silly joke in this book is hilariously illustrated!Many kids of age from 5 to 11 years old enjoy coming up with their variations of these scenarios. It helps them to improve logical reasoning skills, skyrocket creativity, and develop a brilliant sense of humor.There are many important life lessons in the “YES or NO” Crazy Questions Game. At the same time, silly riddles and questions are extremely funny, especially because they are related to scenarios from the beginning of the book.The answers are often unexpected, thought-provoking, and fun to read together, even for parents, grandmas and grandpas, teachers, and elder siblings. Therefore, the whole family, church, or class will enjoy playing this cool quiz game.In this book, your boy or girl will discover:80 Silly “Would You Rather” situations which will often make little kids cry with laughter40 Ultra-funny unique hand-drawn illustrations picturing every single scenarioCrazy Questions Game with 80 sensational “Do you believe it or not” questionsMind-blowing answers with often surprising explanationsGold mine of information related to the scenarios—references to some of the oddest marvels which happened in different places of the worldand much more…Please also click the book’s cover to use Amazon’s ‘LOOK INSIDE’ feature and check out the wonderful illustrations of this funny picture book and see the examples of scenarios.This book is a corny bathroom reader and a top gift idea for the best friend’s birthday party, holiday, and even without an occasion.It's also an awesome read for a kindergarten, elementary school, backyard, beach, park, other outdoor space, summer camp, waiting room, airport, train station, boat, plane, metro, bus, car ride, and so on. It contains some of the best entertaining backseat road trip activities for kids.The readers even told me it could have become an award-winning book if there was such a thing as a crazy game-book award. So I’m sure your sons and daughters will love to read it!And let me tell you something else! A few children even used it as a coloring book and emailed me some jolly drawings of the book’s main hero. It was very touching, indeed!Some moms and dads use these one-of-a-kind scenarios as lunchbox jokes for kids, which was another unexpected idea for me.Please, check out the reviews and you'll see even kids and teenagers give their feedback. So it's definitely recommended as a gift for 5-11-year-old boys and girls.Thus, if you want to make your kid laugh like a hyena, then scroll up and click the “Buy now with 1-Click” button to get your book instantly!

Books for Kids 9-12: BODY SWAP: Catastrophe!!! (A very funny book for boys and girls)

Swapping bodies might be fun for some but when 12 year old Jack Stevenson wakes up from a freak accident one day and finds himself in his dad's body, his life abruptly becomes one huge disaster after another. When he realizes that his dad will have to go to school in his place, things instantly get much, much worse. Will he be able to remain captain of the school football team and what will happen to Holly, the prettiest girl at school who he has a huge crush on and is hoping to be his girlfriend?What will all his friends think of his strange behavior and how will he ever cope with the sudden catastrophe he's been faced with?This hilarious book for girls and boys of all ages with have you laughing from start to finish and keep you wondering what is going to happen next.If you love funny books then you will not be disappointed with Body Swap - Book 1: Catastrophe. It is a great book for kids that everyone is sure to enjoy.

49 Excuses for Not Tidying Your Bedroom (The 49... Series Book 1)

"This book made me and my kids cry with laughter. Our favourite one was Excuce 32." ★★★★★"This book has a quirky sense of humour that will no doubt appeal to fans of Wimpy Kid, Barry Loser and David Walliams. There are 49 interesting excuses including illustrations that range from slightly silly to completely outrageous. Even though I am an adult, I did smile a few times while reading this!" ★★★★★•  Is your bedroom a tip?•  Did you forget to tidy?•  Can you hear the sound of parental footsteps getting closer and closer?Here’s 49 (extremely silly) excuses for not tidying your bedroom!Join the comical adventure of these mischievous kids who will try absolutely anything to get away with not tidying their bedrooms. With an illustration for each haphazard attempt, you're guaranteed to laugh, smirk, and chuckle for hours.Disclaimer: reading this eBook will probably make you giggle, but won't help you get away with having a messy bedroom.Recommended Age: 8+

The Baby Brother From Outer Space!: World Book Day 2018 (Baby Aliens)

When Haroon's mum brings his baby brother into school, Izzy and her friends are ALARMED! The baby is clearly using mind control because the office ladies are being REALLY NICE. He spells space words with his blocks and he REALLY LIKES SCHOOL DINNERS! But it's when he starts USING HIS ALIEN PHONE that they know. Haroon's baby brother is from outer space and he's MAKING CONTACT WITH ALIENS! A brand new laugh-out-loud story created especially for World Book Day by Blue Peter Award winners Pamela Butchart and Thomas Flintham. Read more of Izzy's adventures! Read more of Izzy's adventures! Baby Aliens Got My TeacherThe Spy Who Loved School DinnersMy Headteacher Is a Vampire RatAttack of the Demon Dinner LadiesTo Wee Or Not To Wee!There's a Werewolf In My Tent!The Phantom Lollipop Man!There’s a Yeti in the Playground!Icarus Was Ridiculous!

What Reggie Did on the Weekend: Seriously! (The Reggie Books Book 1)

On the weekend I looked for a new book. I always read the description first because, you know, I won’t read just any old thing. So I read the description for this book and thought it looked okay, so then I read the online sample and laughed so hard that a little bit of pee came out. Okay, a lot of pee came out. ALRIGHT! I PEED SO MUCH I HAD TO CHANGE MY PANTS! There, are you happy now? It’s funny, okay? And it isn’t all about vomit and farts either (okay, a lot of it is about vomit and farts, but what’s wrong with that?)*Every Monday at school, Reggie writes an essay that begins with “On the weekend…” WARNING: You might want to have a spare pair of undies handy while you read about Reggie's weekends.*

Knock Knock!: Over 100 Funny Knock Knock Jokes for Kids (Best Jokes for Kids Book 1)

Funny and Hilarious Knock Knock JokesYou will giggle so hard at these funny knock knock jokes for kids. There are over 100 super-funny and hilarious knock knock jokes created to make you laugh!Over 100 knock knock jokesExcellent for early readersFun for kids, teens, or adultsFrom the book...Knock knock!Who’s there?Manny!Manny who?Manny times I have knocked on this door!Knock knock!Who’s there?Aitch!Aitch who?Bless You!Knock knock!Who’s there?Boo!Boo who?Don’t cry. It’s just a joke!Comedy, humor, and joke-telling have many positive benefits associated with it. Jokes can bring a smile to the face of others and put you in a great mood! Here are a few more benefits associated with joke-telling:Help you bond with friends and familyLighten tense situationsHelp you make friendsGreat conversation startersPerfect for texts and status updatesScroll up and click buy to start laughing today!

jokes for kids: The Best funny Jokes, Riddles, Tongue Twisters and Knock-Knock jokes for kids

The jokes can be enjoyed by everyone both young and old. They can be used for family activity and bonding.This book contains hilarious jokes for kids of all ages to make them laugh and help them learn. It is a book that can serve multi-purpose.The book is arranged in three rounds contain over 100 jokes , It makes you humor.

Bex Carter 1: Aunt Jeanie's Revenge (The Bex Carter Series)

Be sure to check out the first book of the Ava G. Chronicles!Bex is growing up! Read about her high school adventures in the hilarious new series, The Bex Carter Dramadies.Book 1 of the Bex Carter Series: Thirteen-year-old Bex Carter has a lot on her plate. Her biggest challenge is living with her Aunt Jeanie. As much as Bex tries to please her aunt, they always seem to butt heads. Sometimes Bex feels as if Aunt Jeanie goes out of her way to make her life miserable. Aunt Jeanie enrolls Bex in a social group called the Silver Roses, a group that's supposed to teach young girls how to be proper ladies, however it turns out to be nothing more than a club for snobs. Bex wants out, but she's made a deal with Aunt Jeanie. Will Bex take a stand against the Silver Roses or will their snobbery rub off on her?#1: Aunt Jeanie's Revenge#2: All's Fair in Love and Math#3: Winter Blunderland#4: The Great "BOY"cott of Lincoln Middle#5: Love, Politics, and Red Velvet Cupcakes#6: So Scandalous#7: My B.F.F. (Bogus Fake Friend)#8: Camp Lie-A-Lot

LOL: Funny Jokes and Riddles for Kids (Laugh Out Loud Book 1)

Funny and Hilarious Jokes and Riddles for KidsAlso available in PAPERBACK and AUDIOBOOK formatJohnny B. Laughing provides children with lots of fun and laughter with his hilarious and silly jokes. Young readers will have a blast sharing this awesome collection of jokes and riddles with their friends and family! This children's joke book will have youngsters rolling on the floor with laughter and is sure to be a great gift idea for any child. Inside you will find silly and corny jokes, riddles, wordplay, and humor. Also included are some fun mazes for an added bonus!Makes a wonderful birthday gift or holiday gift for kids and joke lovers!100+ funny and hilarious jokes and riddlesChallenging mazes and puzzlesMakes the perfect gift for early and beginning readers"Another instant classic joke book by the world-renowned comedian, Johnny B. Laughing"From the book...Q: What did the salt say to the pepper?A: Hey! What’s shaking?♦ ♦ ♦Q: Why did the car get a flat tire?A: There was a fork in the road!♦ ♦ ♦Q: What do you get if cross a snowman and a shark?A: Frostbite!♦ ♦ ♦Q: What do cows make during earthquakes?A: Milkshakes!♦ ♦ ♦Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor?A: He was feeling crummy!Funny and hilarious jokes for children of all ages, teens, and adults!The Joke King, Johnny B. Laughing, is back with another worldwide mega-bestseller. He decided to remaster all of his joke books and recreate and update them all with even more funny and silly jokes for you to enjoy. The Joke King's collection makes a perfect gift for early and beginner readers, kids ages 6-10 (and up), and even makes a few silly adults chuckle every now and then. These jokes are perfect for text messages, status updates, and a few funny laughs in between.Scroll up and click 'buy' to start laughing-out-loud today!

In Search of a Love Story (Love Story Book One )

Emily Donovan doesn’t have a romantic bone in her body.At least, that’s what her friends Ryan and Ashley keep telling her. They’re convinced her bad luck with men is directly related to her life-long lack of interest in all things romantic. When Emily’s latest relationship crashes and burns, she decides to go along with her friends’ plans for a romance research project. Sure, the idea that she’ll have better luck if she learns about the great romances of literature and film seems a little silly, but Emily figures it can’t hurt.In no time at all, Emily finds herself buried under a mountain of romance novels, chick flicks, and sappy love songs, hopeful that her hard work will pay off with true love. When she meets Greg, Ashley and Ryan are convinced she’s found prince charming—after all, he’s rich, handsome, and totally into Emily. What more could she want? And why does it seem that her friend Elliot isn’t exactly happy for her?Faced with misunderstandings, miscommunications, and a seemingly endless string of missteps, she is nevertheless determined to give true love a try. In doing so, Emily will eventually find that true romance, the kind that lasts, has little to do with stereotypes or clichés, and everything to do with finding out what’s in her own heart.This is book #1 of the Love Story series. Don't miss the sequel, An Unexpected Love Story, available now!

Miranda and Me

Hello and welcome to the first book ever written by a dog - me, Miss Peggy Hart. I just couldn't wait any longer for Miranda's book all about me (Peggy and Me) to come out in October so decided to release my own book ahead of Miranda, and here it is! It turns out I am not just pretty face. And what a pretty face I hear you say. I know. Just look at me. I like to say I look like a cloud breathed by angels. I just say it how I see it. But my skills are not just my incredible natural beauty, I am also quite the literary whizz. And I hope you like my book . What's even more exciting is it contains Twitter stories from the nation's own #AndMe moments, the best of which Miranda and I have hand-selected to appear in this ebook! The great British public have spilled the beans on their own doting companions, canine or otherwise. Oh and it also contains a sneak preview from Peggy and Me AND an exclusive introduction from none other than moi and Miranda. Expect laughter and tears - fuelled by a rich reserve of chaotic cats, pompous pooches and the odd human along the way. I do so hope you like it because I love you very much and want to make you happy. I am lovely like that. Lots of licks and woofs to you and I hope to meet you in person one day.The Pegster signing out (but do follow me on Twitter @realpeggyhart).

Would You Rather Book for Kids: Gamebook for Kids with 200+ Hilarious Silly Questions to Make You Laugh! Including Funny Bonus Trivias: Fun Scenarios For Family, Groups, Kids Ages 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 12

Have Your Child Think Critically, Boost Skills like Speaking and Listening and Defend Choices!Our Would You Rather provides hours of fun-filled activities! It is one of the best ways to educate kids, but at the same time entertain them. Your children will have the opportunity to practice critical thinking and justify their decisions.• Produced and created by professional writers native in the English language• Large activities made easy to see with cute picture themes• Improve hand-coordination skills with our activities• Enhance productivity and improve problem-solving skills• Tons of fun for everyone in the familyOther than the above mentioned points, these activities for kids also provide numerous health benefits such as reduced stress and relaxation.Includes a certificate on the back of the book that you can present to your child upon completion.Order Now and Enjoy One of the Best Would You Rather for Kids!

Journal of a Sneaky Twerp: A Shameless Wimpy Kid Parody

Boys are semi-literate brutes―or are they?Gregor "Shmegegge" Hufflepuff finds himself thrust into the world beyond his insulated cul-de-sac, where sneaky twerps like him have to share the air with kids who, terrifyingly, are slightly different. But nothing scares Gregor more than the slice of metaphorical cheese moldering deep within his soul. Can he and his friend-of-convenience, Jowley Monticello, make it through the year without having to learn anything about themselves?The pitfalls of avoiding growing up are uniquely revealed through the pompous musings and slapdash graffiti of Gregor's so-called journal.When you were ten, did you love the Wimpy Kid series? Then this book is going to piss you off."Wimpy Kid got my reluctant reader flipping pages. But as a teen, after reading Sneaky Twerp, he swears he'll never pick up another book again!" — Hapless Soccer Mom"Wimpy Kid is one of the most disrespectful, cynical, negative books I have ever read. I don't see how this cynical ripoff is going to be any different." — bellumromanum"There are no positive themes in Wimpy Kid. Not one. In fact, I would have to say that the main character is the single most unlikeable child I've ever met in a book for adolescents. By contrast, the protagonist of Sneaky Twerp comes off as not insufferable." — Lede Gershwin Blue Mitchell"My 13 year old son began reading Sneaky Twerp just as he was learning to rebel. Many times he would read it before bed, and I would hear him cackling maniacally in his room. Now, 14 years old, he will often pick it up and read it again. It's sardonic, but the appeal to his age demographic is actually amazing to me. I didn't have to make him think for himself ... he wants to. And he loves it. I would recommend the book to any teen who is learning to read texts with a critical eye rather than lazily accept them at face value." — Pierced Pastor

Love and Chaos: (Standalone Bad Boy Romance) (Growing Pains Book 4)

From USA Today Bestselling author, Willow Summers, is a hilarious and steamy romance.It was supposed to be easy. Just a quick trip to the wine country to help her good friend, Peter. She never expected to meet his bad boy brother...Muscled, tattooed, and riding a Harley, Jace has Cassie’s heart racing and blood boiling. Struggling to keep her desire on a tight leash, she must do everything she can to keep Peter’s secret. But resisting that dimpled smile is harder than she could’ve ever imagined…A standalone book based on the bestselling Growing Pains series. HEA. No cliffhanger!

Work Wife Balance (Kate King Series Book 1)

'This is well-written, very funny and I raced through it, occasionally squealing in horror at the antics of Kate’s colleagues. It’s also a joy to read about a strong woman with a big job and fiery opinions, a nice antidote to the sugary sweet sort of chick lit.' DAILY MAILKate King is furiously flailing to keep afloat. As her team bicker, finger-point and cheat their way through rumours of sackings and site closures, her ill-tempered husband is becoming increasingly embittered and secretive. Kate knows she must address his petulant question: “Surely there’s more to life than this?” but all her energies are required to dodge the corporate bullets constantly fired in her direction.Under pressure from an attractive, younger colleague, Kate is also concerned by her sudden invisibility to the opposite sex and the alarming appearance of back fat. Disturbingly, beige knitwear has started to call to her from the shelves of M&S.Growing more and more suspicious of her husband’s activities, pressure builds on Kate both at work and at home until her turbulent year reaches its climactic end. Can she continue to balance precariously between work and marriage, or is one end of the scales going to hit the ground with a resounding thud?

Elly in Bloom: A Novel

Surrounded by lush flowers and neurotic brides, Elly Jordan has carved out a sweet life for herself as the owner of Posies, a boutique florist in St. Louis. Not bad for a woman who drove away from her life two years earlier when she found her husband entwined with a redheaded artist. Sure, Elly has an embarrassingly beautiful best friend, a badly behaved sheepdog, and a sarcastic assistant she simply calls "Snarky Teenager," but overall her days are pleasantly uneventful. As a bonus, her new next-door neighbor just happens to be an unnervingly handsome musician who has an eye for curvy Elly. Just when she feels that she is finally moving on from her past, she discovers that an extravagant wedding contract, one that could change her financial future, is more than she bargained for. With the help of her friends, staff, and more than a few tasty sandwiches, Elly bravely agrees to take on the event that threatens to merge her painful history with her bright new life, and finds herself blooming in a direction she never imagined.

101 Dirty Jokes - sexual and adult's jokes

Sex and humor. 101 hilarious and dirty jokes for adults.

Love Love

**AMAZON BESTSELLER**Gabrielle Willis is smart. She's funny. And oh yes, she's a bit klutzy.When Gabrielle left sunny California bound for the energy of Manhattan, she was willingly leaving the life she had known for the new life she would create. But was she really leaving something behind or was she running away?On the outside, Gabrielle Willis has it all under control. A new life in Manhattan, a great roommate, and a good job. But she is haunted. Haunted by a memory she's tried to forget and by a family who's abandoned her. But what happens when what's on the outside is only an illusion and in perfect contradiction to what's buried deep within?Enter Dane Rhodes. He's gorgeous, smart, and sexy as hell. Just what Gabby wants, or so she thinks. But when she meets Brad Dixon, the sweet guy with the crooked smile, he begins to make her see that the very thing she is trying to run from is the very thing that just may push her to see the light.**This book contains mature language and sexual content and is only recommended for readers 17 and older. Chick lit with a quirky heroine and emotion.

The Best of Laugh Yourself Silly Jokes for Kids Sampler: Children's Juvenile Humor Ages 6-14 Riddles Knock-Knock Jokes

LAUGH YOURSELF SILLY is just what this book will do to readers, with a ton of jokes and hysterical illustrations, there's something for every kid ages 6-14! This 70-page book features samples from some of the best jokes from each book in the series: jokes for kids, knock-knock, spooky, sports, school, holidays, animals, food, funny situations & more, Plus--new, original jokes you won't find in other joke books! Sign up at the author's website, hariddle.com, to get the full book - free! Get info about upcoming titles in the series.

151+ Funny Blonde Jokes: Funny Dumb Blonde Jokes

The Funniest Blonde Jokes in the World!Did you know that laughing can have a positive physical and mental effects on the body! Laughter can lower blood pressure, lighten tense situations, and help you bond with friends and family. Jokes, humor, and comedy come in many forms. Whether it is a few funny jokes, a silly joke book, or a funny movie, we can all benefit from the positive effects of comedy and humor! You'll love this hilarious joke book. Share a funny joke with a friend today!151+ funny blonde jokesHilarious blonde insults and humorHours of funny jokes and entertainmentAre you looking for funny and hilarious blonde jokes?With this MASSIVE collection of funny blonde jokes you can make everyone laugh! This ebook full of funny blonde jokes is perfect for any occasion. You and your friends will laugh for hours at this funny joke book.Uses for funny jokes...Can aid in storytellingGreat for conversation startersImproves conversation and social skillsCan make others laugh, smile, and be more playfulCan lighten tense moods and create repoire with othersLaugh until it hurts...Q: Why did the blonde climb up to the roof of the bar?A: Someone said that the drinks were on the house.Funny Blonde Jokes!Q: How would a blonde kill a fish?A: She would try to drown it.HAHA!Q: How do you keep a blonde in suspense?A: Put her in front of a mirror and tell her to wait for the other person to say hello.Funny Blonde Jokes!Q: Why don't blondes like audio-books?A: There are no pictures.HAHA!Q: What is dumber than the blonde jokes above?A: Me for wasting hours editing and typing these damn things.Funny Blonde Jokes!LOL Funny Jokes ClubThe LOL Funny Jokes Club is dedicated to comedy. We'll tickle your funny bone with our side-splitting jokes and humor. Whether it's funny and hilarious one-liners, dirty adult jokes, or laugh-out-loud rib tickling knee slappers, the LOL Funny Jokes Club does it all! Laugh until it hurts!Scroll up and click "buy" to start laughing now!Tags: blonde jokes, blonde joke book, blonde joke books, funny blonde jokes, blond, blonds, blonde jokes ebook, ebook, ebooks, books, jokes, blondes, blonde, kindle joke book, kindle books, funny jokes, book, comedy, funny, humor, kindle ebooks, club, dirty jokes, adult jokes, lol jokes, haha, funny joke book, funny joke books, funny jokes, hilarious, ebook, ebooks, blonde jokes, laugh, laughter, laughing, funny books, e books, ebook download, jokes, joke book, funny jokes, funny joke books

Yo Mama Jokes Bible: 350+ Funny & Hilarious Yo Mama Jokes (Funny Yo Momma Jokes Book 1)

Yo Mama Jokes Bible!350+ Funny & Hilarious Yo Mama JokesYo mama is so fat…Yo mama is so skinny…Yo mama is so old…Yo mama is so tall…Yo mama is so short…Yo mama is so stupid…Yo mama is so poor…Yo mama is so ugly…Yo mama is so bald…Yo mama is so hairy…Yo mama is so lazy…Other Yo mama jokes…ALL NEW YO MAMA JOKES!Yo mama is so stupid… she thought Christmas wrap was Snoop Dogg’s new song!Yo mama is so fat… she posted a picture on Instagram and it crashed!Yo mama is so tall… Shaq looks up to her!Yo mama is so ugly… she looks like she has been bobbing for apples in hot grease!Yo mama is so skinny… when she wears skinny jeans, they look like bell-bottoms!Yo mama is so old… she has an autographed Bible!Yo mama is so short … you can see her feet on her driver’s license!Yo mama is so hairy… that Bigfoot tried to take her picture!Yo mama is so fat… she sat on an iPhone and turned it into an iPad!Yo mama is so stupid… she went to a dentist to fix her Bluetooth!Yo mama is so old… her memory is in black and white!Yo mama is so poor… she put a Happy Meal on layaway!Yo mama is so ugly… she’s the reason blind dates were invented!Yo mama is so short… she can use a sock for a sleeping bag!Yo mama is so bald… you can see what’s on her mind!Best-Selling Author ~ Johnny B. LaughingThe Joke King is back with another hilarious joke book full of funny, laugh-out-loud, crazy comedy and MASSIVE assortment of yo mama jokes!WARNING: This funny joke book will cause you to laugh hysterically!Scroll up and click 'buy' to start laughing today!

100+ Insults: Funny Insults, Comedy, and Humor!

The Funniest Insult Jokes in the World!Did you know that laughing can have positive physical and mental effects on the body? Laughter can lower blood pressure, lighten tense situations, and help you bond with friends and family. Jokes, humor, and comedy come in many forms. Whether it is a few funny jokes, a silly joke book, or a funny movie, we can all benefit from the positive effects of comedy and humor! You'll love this hilarious joke book. Share a funny joke with a friend today!100+ funny insults and jokesHilarious insults, comedy, and humorHours of funny jokes and entertainmentWith this MASSIVE collection of funny insult jokes you can make everyone laugh! This ebook full of funny insults is perfect for any occasion. You and your friends will laugh for hours at this funny joke book.Uses for funny jokes...Can aid in storytellingGreat for conversation startersImproves conversation and social skillsCan make others laugh, smile, and be more playfulCan lighten tense moods and create rapport with othersAre you looking for funny and hilarious insult jokes?You’re so dumb… you thought the Harlem Shake was a drink!LOLYou’re so fat… you fell out of both sides of the bed!HAHAYou’re so poor… you wash your paper plates!LOLYour feet are so big your shoes need license plates!This Hilarious Joke Book has 100+ Funny Insults About...You’re so dumb insultsYou’re so ugly insultsYou’re so fat insultsYou’re so skinny insultsYou’re so poor insultsOther insults…LOL Funny Jokes ClubThe LOL Funny Jokes Club is dedicated to comedy. We'll tickle your funny bone with our side-splitting jokes and humor. Whether it's funny and hilarious one-liners, dirty adult jokes, or laugh-out-loud rib tickling knee slappers, the LOL Funny Jokes Club does it all!Scroll up and click "buy" to start laughing now!

Drive, Ride, Repeat: The Mostly True Account of a Cross-Country Car and Bicycle Adventure

Author Al Macy is a character and a tightwad with a unique sense of humor. He and his wife squirreled away enough money to retire early, do interesting things, and take unusual trips. As he puts it:“Every day I wake up with nothing to do, and by the end of the day, I've only gotten half of it done.”During his working life, Macy was a neuroscientist, computer game programmer, jazz trombonist, chef, CEO, piano player, clam digger, and technical writer.The book is a journal of a car/bicycle/camping trip from California to St. Louis and back, but Macy promises that “if it starts sounding like one of your brother-in-law’s boring slide shows, I will stop this book, and we’ll turn around and go home. I mean it.”Interspersed with the journal chapters, you'll find thought-provoking life tips, stories from the past, and descriptions of Al's wacky inventions. You’ll hear poignant anecdotes about what happened when doctors discovered a golf-ball-sized tumor in his wife’s brain and how everything they owned burned.Here's an example of one of those chapters:Chapter 47 - Puking in a ThunderstormHere’s a mishap that illustrates the saying “You’re on an adventure when you wish you were home wishing you were on an adventure.”In 1982, Lena and I were visiting her folks in Sweden, and we went on a ryggsäcksfotvandringtur. To speak Swedish, all you do is take a bunch of English words, screw around with them, and squeeze them together. For example, in the big word in the last sentence, the only real foreign part is “rygg” which refers to one’s back. Other than that it’s just “Back - sack - foot - wandering - tour,” meaning “wandering around on foot with a pack on your back,” or “backpacking.”Apparently we have 1,019,729.6 words in English (.6 really?). In Swedish, the total depends on how you count them. Is "ryggsäcksfotvandringtur” one word, or just five words stuck together? Most Swedish dictionaries have around a half-million entries, but if you count words that are Velcroed together, it has many more.Speaking of Velcro, it was discovered when Georges de Mestral went for a fotvandringstur, and noticed the burrs that stuck to his pants. The word “Velcro” was added to our dictionary in the year nineteen something-or-other. I’ve learned that the phrase “Velcro forehead” refers to the overly dramatic gesture of tilting your head back and holding the back of your wrist against your forehead (”Oh, woe is me!”). Can you tell that I’m worried that this chapter is too short, and I am desperately looking for stuff to add?So anyway, where was I? Oh, yeah, Lena and I were on a short backpacking trip in the mountains of sweden. On our route to the more desolate sections, we passed houses that had sod growing on the roof. And when I say sod, I don’t mean the neat, well-mowed stuff you buy at the nursery. I mean long messy grass, other small plants, cuckoo birds, and gophers. And these weren’t museum displays put up for tourists, people were really living in these things. It’s where we get the saying “People who live in sod houses should throw stones, but no stones from the roof, please.”This was a great place to foot wander, but when we were the farthest from the car, Lena got sick (really sick), and both Lena and the heavens opened up at the same time. It gave me a case of Velcro forehead, and my main memory of that trip is of continually taking tiny plastic snack bags of vomit out and dumping them in the streams of water surrounding the tent.Luckily Lena’s Scandinavian constitution won out over the bugs, and the next morning she was all better and ready to drag me home, out of the wilderness. So, we had a general good time despite the puking adventure.If that kind of humor appeals to you, you need to buy this book. And if you're still on the fence, please use the Look Inside feature or download a free sample to your Kindle.

The Reluctant Swappers: 3 Super Hardcore Sex Humiliation and Parody Etotic Stories Bundle

ContentsThe Reluctant Swappers1Sam173Shaved Pussy412

An Unlikely Place for Love (Virginia Collection Book 1)

Kate Tanner is getting more than she bargained for in this "woman disguised as a man" romance. Fleeing from her parents' killers, she disguises herself as Billy Ingram and leaves the big city Virginia life to work on a remote farm out in the middle of nowhere, North Dakota where the handsome, but aloof, Chad Walker hires her as a farmhand. Between trying to prove that she can handle the more demanding farm chores and trying to fit in with the other farmhands, she has her work cut out for her. Then, one morning, Chad discovers she's a woman, so she quickly makes up the excuse that "Billy's" sister, Kate, decided to come by for a visit. That's when things really get interesting. Lacy Montgomery is in love with "Billy" and nothing disgusts the woman. The farmhands are in love with Kate. She's in love with Chad who may or may not love her back. Her brother, the real Billy, shows up and she's forced to don on another female disguise to ward off Lacy altogether. Among the laughter and constant costume changes, Kate might discover that the most unlikely place for love is the perfect place after all.

The Sparrow (The Returned Series)

In Jason Mott’s haunting and unforgettable debut novel, The Returned, an impossible miracle is occurring all across the globe.This is Part 2 in the exciting and much anticipated prequels to Jason Mott’s The Returned.Praise for Jason Mott–‘With fine craftsmanship and a deep understanding of the human condition, Jason Mott has woven a tale that is in turns tragic and humorous and terrifying’ – Eowyn Ivey, Author of The Snow Child –‘Fantastically readable’ – The Times–‘Could be the next Lovely Bones’ – Entertainment Weekly–‘Fantastically readable’ – The Times–‘Gripping’ – Shortlist–'Mott tackles some big themes here, especially the vagaries of spirituality, and scores with one of the most emotionally resonant works in many seasons' – Essence Magazine–'It will…make you question what it means to be human and what you'd do in a similar situation' – The Sun–'Get in early before the hype begins' – Star Magazine–'The Returned transforms a brilliant premise into an extraordinary and beautifully realized novel. My spine is still shivering from the memory of this haunting story. Wow.' -Douglas Preston, #1 bestselling author of The Monster of FlorenceThis is the beginning of the ReturnedPart 1 – The FirstPart 2 – The SparrowPart 3 – The ChoiceThe Returned

Suds and Sam

Humor, Heat, Action and Sass..."What the heck are you doing here? I could've killed you!" "Sugar, I strolled on up, whistling. I figured you couldn't miss me."A dick in Manhattan? You've got to be kidding me.Don't get me wrong. I respect she's got plenty of attitude. I especially hold her Uncle Vinny, a mob boss, in high esteem. Both he and her police-chief father explain how I should book my own funeral if I mess with her. Not much for authority, I thank them for their concern. However, she's mine and I plan on keeping her. When she goes missing, at first I figure she's miffed. Yeah, I may not always take her career as seriously as she'd like. But hey, didn't I help her solve the missing-cat-caper? That should count for something, right? When she doesn't answer my texts, I check with her family and my stupid heart stops. Where the hell is she? Suds and Sam will make you laugh and yet keep you turning one more page all night long.Grab your copy now. Note: Beware of healthy, passionate, panty-melting scenes. No cliffhangers. Happy ending guaranteed.

Super Zombie Juice Mega Bomb (A Zombie Apocalypse Novel Book 1)

When life gives you lemons, kill zombies -- turns out lemon juice neutralizes the undead.After a failed attempt at running away, best friends Nathan and Misty return home expecting to face angry parents. Instead, they discover the military has destroyed the bridges out of their rural town and everyone's fled--except a small horde of the living dead. The stress of flesh-eating zombies may be more than their already strained relationship can handle.Even with the help of the town geek and lemonade-powered Super-Soakers, there's not enough time to squeeze their way out of this sticky mess. Unless the trio eradicates the zombie infestation, while avoiding the deadly zombie snot, the military will blow the town, and them, to pulp. Their only shot is something with a lot more punch. Something like the Super Zombie Juice Mega Bomb. But even if their friendship survives, there's another problem: Someone has to lure the undead into the trap.The reviews are in and Super Zombie Juice Mega Bomb is a must read:"I could not put this book down. I really hate reading, but this book I could read 1000 times..." 5-Stars --A kid review from Campermaniac"The entire book is a joy to read, and it's hard to put down, too!" 5-Stars --JJ, Amazon Vine Top 500 Reviewer"Super Zombie Juice Mega Bomb is a quick, fun read filled with humour and zombie slaying action that I'm sure all ages will enjoy." --Ken, Paperless Reading Blog"SUPER ZOMBIE JUICE MEGA BOMB was a fun, fast pace, unique read that I look forward to reading more from the author and MUST have a sequel. I would sell a blue smurf for a sequel to this book." 5-Stars --Gothical Book Reviews"The adventure was suspenseful and page turning, mixed with a great deal of humor. It was like reading a book about my sixteen-year-old daughter!" --Jennifer, Goodreads Reviewer"This book was the perfect blend of 'B movie' humor and the zombie gore I love... I loved this book!" 5-Stars --Angela Fristoe, Author of Songbird"The humor is what really caught my attention when I started reading SZJMB, and the action kept me engaged to the end. ...it should engage even the most reluctant of readers." --Manga Maniac Cafe"I read it all in one day. Very rare that I say I couldn't put the book down. I did not sleep until I finished reading it. I'd recommend this book to anyone (above 10 years of age) even if you're not into zombies." 5-Stars --David Santos, author of The Hopeless ChristianticIncludes two free short stories.Print version is approximately 204 pages (40,000 words).Parents note: This book contains no cursing or strong language, and no explicit gore or violence. However, scenes of intense zombie action may be disturbing to younger readers.Punctuation in some reviews may be corrected.

Dinosaur Jokes: Funny Jokes for Kids

Funny & Hilarious Dinosaur Jokes for Kids!Are you looking for a fun book to keep the kids entertained and happy? This funny joke book for kids is excellent for early and beginning readers. Laughing and jokes have been proven to have positive mental and physical effects on the body!This book is especially great for long trips, waiting rooms, and reading aloud at home. Also available in paperback and audiobook formats!Funny dinosaur jokesExcellent for early and beginner readersHours of fun and entertainment for kids and childrenGreat for long trips, waiting rooms, and reading aloudFunny and hilarious dinosaur jokes for children of all ages, teens, and adultsThe Joke King is back with another hilarious joke book full of funny, laugh-out-loud, crazy comedy and MASSIVE assortment of dinosaur and prehistoric jokes for children of all ages, teens, and adults. This awesome joke book for kids is easy to read and full of laughs!WARNING: This funny joke book will cause you to laugh hysterically!From this Funny Joke Book...Q: What should you do when a dinosaur sneezes?A: Get out of the way!HAHA!Q: What was the most flexible dinosaur?A: Tyrannosaurus Flex!LOL!Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?A: Because the chicken wasn’t invented yet!HAHA!Q: What dinosaur would you find in a rodeo?A: Bronco-saurus!LOL!Q: What do you get when you cross a bomb and a dinosaur?A: Dino-mite!Funny Dinosaur Jokes for Kids! (Clean Jokes for Children)Your prehistoric friends might not think these jokes are that funny, but you will be rolling on the floor laughing. This awesome collection of dinosaur jokes is one of the funniest collections in the world! These jokes about dinosaurs of all shapes and sizes will make make you go wild with laughter. This joke book is excellent for kids, children, teens, and adults. Johnny B. Laughing is the online comedy king!Scroll up and click 'buy' to get your paws on a copy today!

101+ Funny Music Jokes: Hilarious Music & Musician Jokes, Comedy, Puns, and Humor

101+ Funny Music & Musician JokesDid you know that laughing can have positive physical and mental effects on the body? Laughter can lower blood pressure, lighten tense situations, and help you bond with friends and family. Jokes, humor, and comedy come in many forms. Whether it is a few funny jokes, a silly joke book, or a funny movie, we can all benefit from the positive effects of comedy and humor! You'll love this hilarious joke book. Share a funny joke with a friend today!101+ funny jokes for about musicGreat to send as text messages to friendsSilly and hilarious jokes, comedy, and humorHours of funny jokes and entertainmentWith this hilarious collection of music and musician jokes you can make everyone laugh! This ebook full of funny jokes is perfect for any occasion. You and your friends will laugh for hours at this funny joke book.Uses for funny jokes...Can aid in storytellingGreat for conversation starters and textsImproves conversation and social skillsCan make others laugh, smile, and be more playfulCan lighten tense moods and create rapport with othersFunny Music and Musician Jokes!101+ Funny and Hilarious Jokes!The LOL Funny Jokes Club is dedicated to comedy. We'll tickle your funny bone with our side-splitting jokes and humor. Whether it's funny and hilarious one-liners, dirty adult jokes, or laugh-out-loud rib tickling knee slappers, the LOL Funny Jokes Club does it all!Scroll up and click "buy" to start laughing now!Tags: funny jokes, funny, music, musical, musician, music jokes, joke, blonde jokes, joke book, funny joke books, funny dirty jokes, musician jokes, silly jokes, ebook, ebooks, jokes, funny, kindle joke books, funny jokes, book, comedy, lol, jokes, funny, jokes, haha, joke, laugh, laughing, giggle, humor, comedy, uncensored, funny, humor, kindle ebooks, joke club, dirty jokes, adult jokes, funny jokes books, hilarious jokes, funny books, funny jokes, laugh, laughter, laughing, funny books, e books, ebook download, jokes, joke book, joke of the day, funny jokes, funny joke books, funny quotes, funny

Lily Loves to Love: ROM-COM FUN FICTION

Have you ever read a book and thought I do not want the main character to end up with the predictable hero? I wish she had gotten with the other man instead. Well here is your chance to change that scenario and choose whom you would like Lily to love. In this book, many comical things tend to happen to and around Lily Lockhart as she deals with her job, her love life and her family. Not to mention her friends. So like a lot of us, she is simply an ordinary woman trying to survive this modern world and not always getting it right before mistakes come back to bite her on the bum. As the quirky but loveable girl just cannot help herself sometimes. This is all before trying her hand at a spot of charity work, when she decides that life is far too short to spend it selfishly.At the start of the year, she ends her engagement and before long, there is plenty of male interest heading her way. We are talking about ‘The Handsome One’ (Sean) and ‘The Funny One’ (Tom). In addition, there is also ‘The Rich One’ (Peter) but Lily cannot choose between them. Therefore, in the closing chapters, it is down to you ‘the reader’ to decide who wins Lily's heart since there is a fun multiple-choice style ending to the story. Will you pick the boyfriend, the best friend or the boss? Only one problem, she’s pregnant so ‘who’s the daddy’?

Confessions of a Queen B* (The Queen B* Book 1)

"Fans of YA will totally get a kick out of McHugh's novel not only because it's funny, but also because the characters are so real." -- RT Book ReviewsWINNER of the NATIONAL READERS CHOICE AWARD for best YA of 2015Alexis Wyndham is the other type of Queen B—the Queen B*tch.After years of being the subject of ridicule, she revels in her ability to make the in-crowd cower via the exposés on her blog, The Eastline Spy. Now that she's carved out her place in the high school hierarchy, she uses her position to help the unpopular kids walking the hallways.Saving a freshman from bullies? Check.Swapping insults with the head cheerleader? Check.Falling for the star quarterback? So not a part of her plan.But when Brett offers to help her solve the mystery of who’s posting X-rated videos from the girls’ locker room, she’ll have to swallow her pride and learn to see past the high school stereotypes she’s never questioned—until now.And don't miss the sequel, The Queen B* Strikes Back, available NOW!

Funny Feckin' Irish Jokes: Humorous Jokes About Everything Irish...sure tis great craic!

Do you Like funny feckin’ Irish jokes? Well then, you’ve come to the rite place! In this humorous eBook the author has made an epic collection of the funniest Irish jokes, from the popular kerryman jokes to the timeless Paddy Irishman jokes this eBook will have you in stitches! This book is a must for anyone intending to visit Ireland or for the many Irish diaspora abroad wanting to reconnect with their Irish humour. Did ya hear the one about the Irish boomerang?It doesn’t come back it just sings songs about how much it wants to!What do you call an Irishman who’s been dead for 50years? PeatHow do you get an Irishman on the roof? Tell him the drinks are on the houseWhat do you call a Kerryman under a wheelbarrow? A mechanicPaddy Englishman, Paddy Irishman and Paddy Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender turns around to them and says; "What is this, some kind of joke?" Warning: Contains funny feckin’ Irish Jokes!Grab your copy today!Also available in paperback!

Episode Bad Love: A Romance Novel, Alpha Male Insta Love Series (Medical Billionaires Series Book1)

Romance Book "Bad Love" Alpha Male Insta Love Series by Best Selling Author Lauren Snow! PROMO for LIMITED timeBad LoveTrey Frances (32) is the incredibly good-looking, but spoiled and fickle heir of a prominent real estate tycoon. He’s got a bit of a temper on him. But that hardly gets in the way of him charming the panties off of women he comes across. His spell works on most ladies. Others, not so much. And Rheese Armitage (28) falls in the second category. Rheese is a no-nonsense, laser-focused junior college student who is concerned about one thing and one thing only: becoming a doctor. She’s interning at Durham-Nguyen General Hospital while waitressing at a local bistro to get through school and make ends meet. The doctors she shadows praise her for her hard work. She’s thriving and getting along well with the patients she’s assigned. That is until the suave, assertive Trey Frances winds up under her care after a nasty bar brawl. A broken rib, a split brow and a black eye were the souvenirs he brought with him. While he’s being nursed back to health, Trey gives Rheese a hard time, truly testing her patience. He makes several passes at her which she boldly denies. She’s iron clad. There is no getting through to her it seems. But when she ends up on the verge of getting evicted from her place, she melts into the most vulnerable thing there ever was. She doesn’t want to ask for help. But Trey is worth billions and he’s just within arm’s reach. All she has to do is ask. You’re too pretty to be so uptight, he says. I know you’ve got something heavy on your mind. Just talk to me.Trey’s words make her cave. She tells him everything. And to her surprise, he offers to help. But what are the are condition? he tells her there are.Rheese’s heart races. What is he going to ask me to do?Free Books and more updates >>> https://BookHip.com/SFRBF <<< Discount Promo Limited Time

I fancied you until I saw you yawn

A collection of short, dark and spectacularly funny poetry that explores an alternative view of modern life. From using the cash machine, to sitting on the loo, "I fancied you until I saw you yawn" will take you on a journey you'll never forget.Brace yourself for the ride of your life!

Easter Cookie: A Frenemies to Lovers Romantic Comedy (A Year In Love Book 1)

Sinful weekends in Vegas have never been this fun.NatalieThinking outside the box has gotten my business to the top. Few companies can put together an event with the jaw-dropping quality I deliver. I'll be damned if I let Mr. Stephen Know-it-All Clark steal this potential client from me. We might have this 'frenemies with benefits' thing going, but I'll outbid his proposal and kick his perfect behind without breaking my stride.Or my designer stilettos.All I've got to do is not get distracted by his rippling six-pack.That should be easy.Right?Yeah, right.SteveGetting the Sexy & Sinful Spa & Resort account is the difference between expanding or filing for bankruptcy. My partner has just visited the resort. She made personal connections with the general manager and brought back invaluable suggestions. We've put together the perfect proposal and a killer presentation. What could go wrong?Famous last words.All I've got to do is not get distracted by Ms. Natalie Todeschini. Too bad her curves have been my downfall since high school.Too darn distracting.That should be easy.Right?Yeah, right.What if what happens in Vegas doesn't stay there?Download today the first installment in this delicious new series and find out if Natalie and Steve survive Easter weekend in Sin City.Easter Cookie - Book #1 in the brand-new A Year in Love Series. Sexy Romantic Comedy stories that will have you curl your toes and split your side._________________________________Check out these other books by USA Today bestselling author Liz Gavin:Knight’s Edge Series – Rock Star romanceTristanNoahAidanDukeKnight's Edge Collection - 4 full-length novels in one boxed setLuck Series – Suspenseful RomanceLuck of the IrishSt. Patrick’s LuckSexy & Sinful Series - Steamy Contemporary RomanceOur Valentine (Reverse Harem)A Year in Love - Steamy Short StoriesEaster CookieCookie WarsFirecracker CookieThankful Cookie – coming out in November 2020Highland Celts Series – Fantasy RomanceCeltic Fire

Dog Jokes: Funny Jokes for Kids

100+ Funny and Hilarious Dog Jokes for Kids!Joke telling is very fun and can bring a smile to the face of others. Kids love jokes! Jokes can aid in storytelling, create laughs, and help with conversation and social skills. Your child will love this hilarious joke book full of clean jokes about dogs and puppies.Kids and children can practice their reading and joke telling skills with this funny dog joke book. Beginning and early readers can enjoy hours of fun and entertainment. This book is especially great for traveling, waiting rooms, and reading aloud at home. Also available in paperback and audiobook formats!Jokes from this funny book...Q: Where do you usually find lost dogs?A: It all depends on where you lose them!HAHA!Q: What kind of dog sniffs out flowers?A: A bud hound!LOL!Q: What do you call a happy Lassie?A: A jolly collie!HAHA!Q: What kind of dog is a human's best friend?A: Palmation!LOL!Q: How do you stop a dog from barking in the front yard?A: Put him in the backyard!HAHA!Q: Why did the dog run in circles?A: Because it is not that easy to run in squares!Funny Dog Jokes for Kids!The Funniest Dog Jokes for in the World! (Clean Jokes for Children)100+ funny dog and puppy jokesExcellent for early and beginning readersHours of fun and entertainment for your childGreat for long trips, waiting rooms, and reading aloudThis funny joke book is full of funny dog and puppy jokes that will have you laughing for hours! This is one of the best joke collections in the world. These jokes about dogs and puppies will have you laughing for hours. These funny jokes are excellent for kids, children, teens, and adults. Early and beginner readers can practice reading aloud and learning.Scroll up and click 'buy' to get your paws on this funny joke book!

100 Best Jokes: Family Edition

One hundred of hilarious and funny jokes !Have fun and laugh!

Sweet Rivals, Hate You, Love You ( Book 1) - An Enemies-To-Lovers Small-town Romance

A Mya Grey's new young adult clean romance. You will fall in love with this second chance  sweet small-town romance. From  enemies to lovers. Can a childhood rivalry revive their passion after so many years apart? You can hate somebody with a passion, but passion comes in many forms. Noah Snipe lives the life of a brazen man riddled with over-confidence -and why shouldn’t he, with such suave brown hair and daring green eyes.Noah and Lexi hated each other with a passion. Unbeknownst to the two, passion comes in many forms. Their rivalry starts with toy mishap in the sandpit as children. As the pair grows, it becomes a habit to get under each other’s skin, to battle, to slump and thrive at the hand of one another’s competition, until she kissed him a week before graduation ..and said it was a mistake.  8 years later....Out of nowhere, she came smacking into him. Now that rigid but pretty face stared at him from every angle of his mind. It seeped into his brain and he couldn’t think of anything else.  This time, Noah will make sure nothing can come between the two of them .. except ..  WARNING: CLIFFHANGER IN THE END

Big Book of Nonsense Part 1

Jam-packed with the very best nonsense rhymes and tricky tongue-twisters, this wonderfully exuberant collection contains quirky, color illustrations from Colin West and lashings of his wildly wacky verse! With sections such as 'Moments with Monsters' and 'Curious Creatures' this brilliant book features poems and wordplay to satisfy nonsense-lovers everywhere!

Mouse Jokes!: Funny Mouse Jokes for Kids (Funny Jokes for Kids)

Funny Mouse Jokes for Kids!Joke telling is very fun and can bring a smile to the face of others. Kids love jokes! Jokes can aid in story-telling, create laughs, and help with conversation and social skills. Your child will love this hilarious joke book full of clean jokes about mice! Also includes vibrant and cute illustrations for early readers.KINDLE UNLIMITED & AMAZON PRIME can read this book for FREE!Kids and children can practice their reading and joke telling skills with this funny mouse joke book. Beginning and early readers can enjoy hours of fun and entertainment.This book is especially great for traveling, waiting rooms, and reading aloud at home.Special Note: The illustrations in the book are optimized for a vivid and colorful experience in e-readers, tablets, phones, and computers!Jokes from this funny book...Q: How does a mouse feel after taking shower?A: Squeaky clean!HAHA!Q: How did the mouse make gold soup?A: She puts in 14 carrots!LOL!Q: Why do mice have long tails?A: Because they would look funny with long legs!HAHA!Q: How do mice celebrate a new home?A: Mouse warming party!LOL!Q: When should a mouse carry an umbrella?A: When it is raining cats and dogs!HAHA!Funny and hilarious mouse jokesExcellent for early and beginning readersVery colorful and cute illustrations for viewingHours of fun and entertainment for your childGreat for long trips, waiting rooms, and reading aloudBONUS INCLUDED! --> FREE Membership to Uncle Amon's Book Club!This funny joke book is full of hilarious mouse jokes! These funny jokes will have you laughing for hours! This is one of the best joke collections in the world. These jokes about mice and rodents will have you rolling in laughter for hours. These funny jokes are excellent for kids, children, teens, and adults. Early and beginner readers can practice reading aloud and learning.Scroll up and click 'buy' to get the hilarious joke collection!100% Money Back GuaranteeTags: funny mouse jokes for kids, funny joke, funny jokes, lol, jokes, mouse, mice, cheese, rodents, mouse book, mice jokes book, ebook, mouse books, funny, mouse jokes, animal book, animal books for kids, animal books for children, animal jokes, ebooks, cheese jokes, kids, haha, hilarious, children, joke, kid, funny jokes for children, kids books, childrens books, childrens book, kids book, chicken books, baby mouse, cheese, books for kids, mice, childrens book, mouse books, mouse books, funny, haha, funny mouse jokes, joke book, funny book, joke books, hilarious, lol, funny joke book, book about mouse, kindle book, kindle ebook, jokes online, comedy, mouse books for kids, mice, mouse, humor, early reader, beginning reader, laugh, laughter, funniest jokes, laughing, kids comedy

My Best Friend's Brother (MY BEST FRIEND'S BROTHER ~ YA Romantic Comedy Book 1)

WILL THEIR LOVE SURVIVE?Book One in the MY BEST FRIEND'S BROTHER Series ( YA Contemporary Romance / Romantic Comedy )- CONTENT WARNING Contains bawdy humor, non-graphic sexual content and some strong language. -When Lilly announced that her estranged brother is coming to live with her, Adonia was shocked—she had no idea her best friend even had a brother! Adonia doesn’t have long to process this revelation before Lilly jets off to vacation in sunny Florida, leaving her alone for weeks. Adonia doesn’t know how she’s going to pass the time, but that changes one morning when she’s sitting in a local book store and spots the sexiest guy she’s ever seen. Little does she know, he’s spotted her too. His name is Luke, and he’s smokin’ hot—so hot that Adonia has dubbed him a Greek god!Luke sweeps her off her feet, beats the tar out of her jerky ex-boyfriend at school, and is a perfect gentleman—what’s not to love about her Greek god? He’s an award-winning skier and Olympic hopeful, and he’s fallen in love with HER! But between stolen kisses, moonlight skiing and heated whispers, Adonia has the feeling Luke is keeping secrets. When she tries to get him to share, Luke clams up. Not knowing what to do, Adonia decides to back off, but has no idea that everything is about to come crashing down around her. Her love for Luke is about to be tested beyond any relationship she’s ever had! Will their love survive the test? Or will Adonia end up with nothing, just as she was starting to think she had everything?______________***** NOTE: Some reviews may contain spoilers, without written notice! If you do not want spoilers to ruin the book, please consider this before reading the reviews! If you post a review, please be kind and do not ruin the book for others — avoid posting spoilers! Thank you! *****

Cave-Trolls and Amazons: humorous fantasy (Fantasy-Humour Series Book 2)

Two cobbled-together armies square up across the Forest battlefield, ranks of trolls and wizards lining up against a host of witches, Sirens and Amazons. But they are fighting a war neither side can hope to win.Only a handful of people stand between them and oblivion, each of whom has problems of their own.Halfshaft, a failed wizard, enlists the help of a gigantic cave-troll in his quest, but his hopes of saving the world are severely dented when he discovers his "ferocious" companion has a lucky handkerchief.Takina, a blonde Amazon in the tiniest of fur bikinis, has been abducted by trollesses and set to reluctant work at a desert sex-slave market. But when the camp is besieged, she suspects that she may have bitten off more than she can swallow.Rod, whose dearest wish is to get back down the pub before last orders, has been co-opted on to a small but select band of witches' donkeys. But even with the help of the wizard and the Amazon, he discovers that it is hard to be heroic with a witch in the saddle."Cave-Trolls and Amazons" is a colourful and imaginative quest-fantasy romp, stuffed full of humour, adventure and squirrel-skin bikinis. Sheer unbridled escapism from the author of "Slave-Girls and Amazons".

Lily White and the Horrible Dwarves: A Crudely Fractured Fairy Tale (Funny Stories for Kids Book 1)

What would the story of "Snow White" be like if the princess was an idiot, the evil queen was completely incompetent, and the dwarves, instead of being happy and silly, were instead super gross and mean? The answer: "Lily White and the Horrible Dwarves," a comedy short story that is so awesome you'll have to read it to believe it.Take your expectations for a fairy tale and throw them out the window! A noble prince? Lame. A humble princess? What a loser! A happy ending? You wish. This eBook is way better than all that. It will make you giggle, laugh, and ask for more. Either that, or it will make you scream for it all to stop. The only way to know is to read it. Download "Lily White and the Horrible Dwarves" now!**Note: This story is not for babies. It can be crude and has jokes about butts, poo, and drunk people. It also has a bit of cartoony violence. There is no swearing or sexual activity. If this story had an MPGG rating it would probably be PG, and may be comparable to a modern episode of the Simpsons.**

Excerpts from the book: Lines by Leon Poems, Prose, and Pictures

Selected poems from the book Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures. Poetry that is insightful, reflective, and humorous. Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures is an eclectic mix of poetry, prose, and short stories that address the subjects of loss, struggle, human behavior, and environment in both humorous and thought-provoking ways.

Art For Everyone : Humorous Poems for Adults

Funny, thoughtful, and anarchic. Bert Smith writes about everyday things and bigger societal issues with the same fearless disregard for conventional wisdom.A little gem of a book – Bert's Mum.Great fun, but I've told him to get a proper job – Bert's Dad.★ Interview with the AuthorQ - Do you have any unusual writing habits?A – I write all the time. I could be sat on a train then start writing something off the top of my head, usually in the notes on my phone. I also enjoy writing in the bath.Q – Where do you get your ideas from?A – I wake up in the early hours of the morning with random ideas buzzing around in my head, so, I write them down and come back to them later. I also get ideas from conversations with friends, films, and listening to people speak in the supermarket! This book has poetry about art, poems about brothers, poetry about the sea, a poem about a serial killer's drawers, spray tans, etc… I have lots of weird and wonderful ideas.Q – Why should readers give this book a try?Because it's interesting, funny, and doesn't take itself too seriously.You don't have to be into Da VinciRaphael or Van Goghsunflowers aren't for everyone believe me I knowmaybe you appreciate a poem or verseyou may even appreciate Banksy's mural of a nurseyou can find art anywhere if you look closely enoughin the design of a caran unmade bedor a designer shirtyou could produce a piece of artas individual as your thoughtsput it down on paper or scrawl a wall in chalkan outlet for the mind is good for mental healthit serves as a distraction from the chaos in the worldI wouldn't be surprised if there's a piece of art in youit could be a drawinga sculptureor a collage stuck with glue✓ Give this unique collection of poetry a try today.

A Lonely Dog on Christmas

Christmas Day is fast approaching. For Beckham, the family bulldog, it means just another year of being ignored while chaos and mayhem reign throughout the house. In this holiday short story full of laughter and family dysfunction, Beckham narrates an ill-conceived plan to create an unforgettable landmark moment in order to reclaim the spotlight as the center of attention. As the extended family gathers to make merry and observe their annual tradition, Beckham has another idea in mind to celebrate and make it a day to remember. A Lonely Dog on Christmas is not intended for children and contains language unsuitable for young readers. 

Flushed: A funny short story (The Meantime Stories Book 1)

"I was unable to stop reading this absurd and awfully seductive tale of power, politics and poo. Most highly recommended." -Readers' Favorite (5/5 STAR REVIEW)During a summit, the President faces his biggest challenge yet: A clogged toilet. What’s the man to do? Leave the bathroom and say nothing on the matter? Or, take matters into his own hands?THE MEANTIME STORIES is a funny short read series that draws inspiration from Terry Pratchett, Monty Python, and Douglas Adams, drenched in Nordic Noir (human folly, plentiful abrupt deaths, snappy dialogue, quirky deep thoughts, and absurd outcomes). It’s glittering darkness, and clouded light.Each story is a stand-alone, ready to be enjoyed when you yearn for 30 minutes of wacky, brainy, and laugh-out-loud entertainment. Longing for surprises, unexpected twists, and silliness with an edge? Look no further, because in the Meantime, anything can happen!

Funny Things: A Joke Book With a Few Sombre Yarns

This is the first joke book in the A Joke Book With a Few Sombre Yarns series – original content throughout. Each book focuses on a particular subject and does a great job of making its author laugh and cry – not bad for a man who knows nothing about comedy or tragedy. Man-made things... Cancel that! Woman-made things... Cancel that! Things and places that are made and arranged by human beings – the author guarantees he will review the status of “human beings” every week, or every day rather, to insure it maintains a satisfactory approval rating – will be the focus of this book. Phew!

Warped: A funny short story (The Meantime Stories Book 3)

"It has to be the funniest, wackiest tale I have read in a long time." -Readers' Favorite (5/5 STAR REVIEW)In this wacky and hilarious sci-fi spoof, Captain Lisa Henderson and her 3,500 passengers on the commuter spaceship Agatha X are stuck inside a wormhole. Their safe return home may depend upon a cinnamon roll.THE MEANTIME STORIES is a funny short read series that draws inspiration from Terry Pratchett, Monty Python, and Douglas Adams, drenched in Nordic Noir (human folly, plentiful abrupt deaths, snappy dialogue, quirky deep thoughts, and absurd outcomes). It’s glittering darkness, and clouded light.Each story is a stand-alone, ready to be enjoyed when you yearn for 30 minutes of wacky, brainy, and laugh-out-loud entertainment. Longing for surprises, unexpected twists, and silliness with an edge? Look no further, because in the Meantime, anything can happen!

The Ridiculously Divine Comedy: A Sample of True Tall Tales

Laugh-Out-Loud Faith!Looking for tall tales to tickle your funny bone and encourage you in God's purpose and calling? Then you will love this ebook-only sample of true stories from actor and comedian Torry Martin! Whether dealing with pythons in South Africa, Toto the puppet in Seattle, or reindeer in Alaska, Torry shares his blunders and the life lessons they've taught him along the way. This selection of comical adventures from his books Of Moose and Men and The Call of the Mild promises laughter and inspiration, all while pointing you toward a loving, present, and personal God. Enjoy these true Torry tales in The Ridiculously Divine Comedy! "Torry is a man full of adventure with a heart for each being he finds in his path, fueled by his keen desire for God."- Tosca Lee, New York Times bestselling author

The Halfshaft Games: humorous fantasy (Fantasy-Humour Series Book 3)

Humorous fantasy from the author of "Slave-Girls and Amazons" and "Cave-Trolls and Amazons".The Games have commenced. A contest of strength, of courage, of the sheer will to survive, all televised for the amusement of the viewers back at home. Pursued through the Forest by a motley collection of trolls, witches, Amazons and amorous dwarfs, Halfshaft the befuddled wizard (proud possessor of two different spells) runs for his life. His only companion is Cherry, his narcissistic team-mate, whose principal achievement is proving that you don't need music to twerk. Together, they attempt to survive against all the Games can throw at them. Which is difficult, in a wizard's robes and sandals. Colourful humorous fantasy/parody for adults.

Eminently Respectable Capers

He was a university boxing champ with a bruised and battered face. But could anything have prepared young Father Sammy for his appointment as Secretary/MC to an irascible and eccentric old Cardinal?At first, his new boss seems like a shining example of childlike and bumbling innocence. But Sammy soon discovers the Cardinal has a fiendish sense of humour.When His Eminence throws the young priest into a knockout adventure of hilarious and mortifying encounters, from midnight motorbike chases to an operatic appearance and a mistaken shooting, Sammy finds himself in the match of his life.

Donald Trump Out of Office Countdown

It really did happen. We've got 4 years ahead of us with The Donald in the Oval Office. But hang in there—it'll be over before you know it!Since the election, many have started counting the days until the end of the presidency of the man who said, "One of the key problems today is that politics is such a disgrace, good people don't go into government." Truer words have never been spoken. Now you can count down each and every exasperating day with this totally "yuge" Out of Office Countdown (R) filled with hilarious and less-than-hilarious WTF moments. Yes, there is hope—and now you can count down the days.

Diary of a Surfer Villager: Book 1: (an unofficial Minecraft series)

An Epic Middle Grade Adventure Series!Jimmy Slade, a young villager, has a dream ... he wants to become a surfer.But, there is only one [BIG] problem, there are no waves in the oceans of the Overworld!!! (And, everyone he tells of his dream thinks he is crazy, except his best friend, Emma.)Jimmy's parents don't think he stands a chance to become a surfer, but he won't give up on his dream.Will Biff the Bully get in his way? Who will help Jimmy solve the problem of creating waves in the flat, flat, FLAT ocean?Find out the answers to these questions and more when you read Book 1 in the ongoing Diary of a Surfer Villager series. This is BOOK 1 in an ongoing Minecraft adventure series.**************************************************************If you like ongoing Minecraft adventure series like those written by Steve the Noob, Dave the Villager, and Cube Kid, you will love Dr. Block's Diary of a Surfer Villager series.**************************************************************Be sure to read all my other unofficial Minecraft-inspired books:Tales of the Glitch Guardians, Book 1 (more books on the way)Baby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 1Baby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 2: Into the MineBaby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 3: Rescue MissionBaby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 4: Mysterious ObjectsBaby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 5: Pursuit of HerobrineBaby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 6: No RestBaby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 7: Herobrine’s MinionBaby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 8: End TimesBaby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 9: ApocalypseThe Complete Baby Zeke: Books 1-9 (also available in audiobook)Baby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 10: Return of the Warrior (also available in audiobook)Baby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 11: Rebellion (also available in audiobook)Baby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 12: Revenge of the Husk (also available in audiobook)THE LIGHTNING TRILOGYBaby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 13: A New EnemyBaby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 14: Shadow LightBaby Zeke: Diary of a Chicken Jockey, Book 15: FORTHCOMINGOtis: Diary of a Baby Zombie Pigman, Book 1Otis: Diary of a Baby Zombie Pigman, Book 2: Konichi JuanOtis: Diary of a Baby Zombie Pigman, Book 3: TrainingCreeptastic (also available in audiobook)Diary of a Werewolf Steve (also available in audiobook)Minecraft Halloween TalesDiary of Herobrine: OriginsDiary of Herobrine: ProphecyDiary of Herobrine: ApotheosisDiary of a Minecraft Bat (also available in audiobook)Diary of a Spider Chicken, Books 1-3Diary of a Surfer Villager, Season One, Books 1-20Diary of a Surfer Villager, Season Two, Books 21-???The Ballad of Winston the Wandering Trader, Books 1-5 (Season One)The Ballad of Winston the Wandering Trader, Books 6-10 (Season Two)A Notchmas Carol: An unofficial Minecraft holiday story inspired by Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol (also available in audiobook)****************************************************Diary of a Surfer Villager is perfect for Minecraft loving kids 9+.If you're looking for books for 9 year old boys and girls, or Minecraft kids books ages 9-12 , these books are just the ticket, especially for reluctant readers.

Father, Son and the Pennine Way: 5 days, 90 miles - what could possibly go wrong?

“Brilliantly written, insightful, brutally honest and laugh-out-loud funny.” “A great read I would recommend to anyone with even the remotest sense of humour.”Five days on the Pennine Way with my youngest son: the challenges we faced and the experiences we shared. What we learned about ourselves and about each other. And the sorry tale of how I came to walk a mile in my underpants…In February 2016 I asked Alex, my youngest son, if he wanted to come for a walk with me. Why? Because I wanted a physical challenge before I was too old for a physical challenge – and I wanted some father/son time before Alex went to university and things were never quite the same again.But I wasn’t a walker: I was a writer: someone who spent his days slumped over a desk. The furthest I’d walked was four miles with the dog on a sunny day. So I had to get fit, I had to find out if I could walk 90 miles in 5 days – and I had to come face to face with the ghosts that had haunted me for ten years.“I absolutely love it. Such an easy read and very humorous.”‘Father, Son and the Pennine Way’ takes you from the February afternoon when I asked Alex to come for a walk with me, to the day we sent off from Malham in North Yorkshire, to the moment we strode up the final hill into Dufton, just outside Carlisle.…But it’s not a book about walking. This is a book about a father/son relationship told through a walk. If you want a traditional guidebook, don’t buy the book. But if you want to be entertained, inspired, amused and taken on a wonderful journey through the Yorkshire Dales, then you’ll love this book.“A brilliant story. Really well put together and very funny.”If you like the humour of Bill Bryson, if you like the personal story in a book like ‘The Salt Path,’ if you like a slightly sideways look at life – then ‘Father, Son and the Pennine Way’ is the book for you.

Politics on the Playground, Episode One: Trump's Tantrum

***WARNING - This book is not for people with politically correct yardsticks wedged up their asses***So you just happened upon this book by chance? You loathe The Donald and you want to see him slammed in a parody. Or maybe you are Donald Trump, and you are gathering evidence for your lawsuit against me. Either way, if this is your first PJ Jones book, you should be warned: I’m rude, crude, and crap your pants funny. Depending on the size of the yardstick wedged up your ass, I may also not be funny at all, disgusting, and shameful. You are about to take a romp through some inane, low-brow prose, where most of your beloved conservative and liberal politicians will be roasted, skewed, and served up with gluten-free wasabi (sorry, Ted Cruz, but we’re fresh out of the gluten kind). In other words, if you don’t spew coffee through your nose while reading this book, YOU’RE READING IT WRONG! Sincerely, PJ* * *What critics are saying about Politics on the PlaygroundThere’s a special spot in hell for writers who parody Hillary Clinton—Madeleine Albright’s neighbor’s catIf you publish this book, PJ, I swear I’ll turn your house into a parking lot—A lawyer who claims he works for Donald Trump I think Trump should throw PJ over the wall—An unnamed source who heard it from a friend of a friend of Sean HannityThis book is a little too gay for me—Someone claiming to be Ted CruzBuy this book, and I’ll send you a free used cigar—A flasher in the Safeway parking lot claiming to be Bill Clinton

Democracy and the Media: The Year in C-SPAN Archives Research, Volume 7

Volume 7 of The Year in C-SPAN Archives Research series focuses on the relationship between democracy and the media. Using the extensive collection of the C-SPAN Video Library, chapters cover Trump political rallies, congressional references of late-night comedy, responses of African American congresswomen to COVID-19 bills, and congressional attacks on the media through floor speeches in the House of Representatives and Senate.The C-SPAN Video Library is unique because there is no other research collection that is based on video research of contemporary politics. Methodologically distinctive, much of the research uses new techniques to analyze video, text, and spoken words of political leaders. No other book examines such a wide range of topics―from immigration to climate change to race relations―using video as the basis for research.

Vox Pop

Funniest, most requested poems in this pamphlet from BBC Radio 4 regular poet Kate Fox.From small girlfriends to exercise mockers and the Glastonbury Festival where she's Poet in Residence for their website in 2013, her wordplay, wit and warmth shines through: "Funny, endearing, cynical"- Sunday Telegraph, "Funny and quirky"- Sarah Millican

Donald Trump Is a Tremendous President, and CNN Is a Tremendous Piece of Garbage: Deport the Crooked Media and Also Deport Mexican Illegals and Obama and People Who Prefer Fake News to Fox News

The media? The media is a joke! President Trump is doing many, many amazing things in office, and he's always sure to let us know that--but CNN, MSNBC, The New York Times, and The Washington Post don't devote themselves to telling us what Trump is telling us about Trump. Instead, they focus on distributing fake news and ludicrous views. That sums up what most people in the media do, except for those fine folks at Fox News. Aren't they great? And isn't Wolf Blitzer an idiot? He and most other journalists and analysts in the media are anti-Trump propagandists who should be replaced with Trump's Twitter. And no one knows that better than President Donald Trump and political pundit Anderson Jimmerson. Read this book and learn what makes Trump so tremendous, and what makes the media so much of a joke, and what makes Obama so much like Benedict Arnold, and what makes Hillary such a crooked lunatic.

A Series of Frustrated Outbursts by a Fake Librarian

The #2 "bestselling" free book on iBooks is now available for Kindle!Library technician Roland Saint-Laurent documents the ups and downs of library work in this "hilarious" new book! This book contains a series of entries covering various aspects of his life on the job, from petty staff back-biting to lurid accounts of patron insanity. Sometimes heart-warming, but mostly prurient, you'll love spending an evening curling up with this delightful volume!

The Old Spice Guys' Grooming Guidance Guide for Guys with Beards & Other Poems

The Old Spice Guys’ Grooming Guidance Guide for Guys With Beards (TOSGGGGFGWB) is an excellent piece of fan fiction for fans of facial hair and is heralded as a marketing masterpiece by the beard community.In 2018, Old Spice released their beard collection, which includes beard wash, beard conditioner, beard oil, and beard balm. The launch of this beard collection was the inspiration behind each poem and the catalyst for every feeling felt within the digital pages of this book.Each line of every poem takes a deep dive into how it feels to have a clean, soft, nourished, and sculpted beard. While this piece of literature explores the existential nuances of beard grooming, each page also acts as an educational tool to guide men through the basics of beardness.

Drop

Could there be an unconscious awareness of the primitive self? Is there an unknown dark side of a personality, perhaps incubated within a shadow of a dormant lair in the mind? Is it hidden, or buried, beneath every diverse fear and insecurity waiting to be found? DROP is a humorously dark fiction that explores the unchartered abyss within the subconscious. While being a philosophical and psychological journey into the heart of madness and evil, it also merges the frantic ramblings of a confused narrator who questions his every conscious projection as either paranoia, or worse, reality. In the grip of a powerful hallucinogen the narrator begins to question his own sanity, along with that of everyone else's around him. Over time he begins to feel the tug of something nefarious clawing through from somewhere deep within; or perhaps calling him into the unknown to stay. Whatever it is, it seems to be manifesting itself through his peers only adding to the struggle inside himself. He tells the story in a perplexed and paranoid manner that draws the reader in to keep them guessing at what is real, and what is mere delusion. DROP creates a maze of psychotic hilarity and desperate madness that leads to an unforgettable ending.Humor, bizarre prophecies, a macabre urban legend, and a philosophical tour of evil are ingredients stirred into this maniacal plot. It is a throwback telling with an all but forgotten style, garnishing a reverie of madness.

Namaland

In 2008, during the global financial crisis, Ireland, led by a disastrous government, went into financial meltdown. Here, that crazy-mad time is recalled in rhyme and song. Enjoy.

Purrfect Poetry (Lost Tower Poetry Book 4)

'This is a delightful, action packed bundle of poetry fun. The photographs are super, I particularly liked the weird cat ones,' SY Cat lovers will adore this hilariously entertaining collection of poetry and photographs chronicling the special relationship we have with our feline friends! This poetry anthology explores the quirkiness of our relationship with cats through poems written from the singular minds of house cats and their human flatmates. The common feline versus human cohabitation challenges are explored and explained. Such as the importance of waiting the full five minutes before deciding to exit through the back door and the eternal conundrum of what present to reward your house human every night. Some poems are written from the point of view of the long-suffering humans revealing the emotional effects of trying to please their cat owners.With titles like "The Tyranny of Cats", “This Is My Chair," "Cat Chilli Floor Surprise," and "He’s More of a Dog Person," the poems collected in Purrfect Poetry perfectly capture the intricacies of sharing your house with a cat.Other poems like Sunil Sharma's "Child and Cat in a High-Rise" are sensitive portrayals of the importance cat friendship plays in our lives. Throughout this charming poetry collection are photos of cats and kittens revealing the many weird and wonderful behaviours of house cats. Purrfect Poetry is the perfect gift for anyone who appreciates the hilarious, sometimes deeply touching and always rewarding nature of life with cats. The Lost Tower Poetry Collection Lost Tower Publications have created a wonderful, dramatic series of poetry books suitable for every occasion. ‘A very valuable piece for anyone's library.’ The Poetry of Flowers A beautiful book of poetry in praise of the humble flower and garden.Along The Shore A celebration of the sea and the shore. And The Tail Wagged On A wonderful collection of funny dog poems. An ideal collection for dog lovers! Purrfect Poetry Cat lovers will adore this hilariously entertaining collection of poetry and photographs chronicling the special relationship we have with our feline friends.Greek Fire A sensuous, seductive retelling of the stories of ancient Greece.Beyond The Hill This collection offers a unique slice of world history, recorded for future generations, so they can understand what it was like to live through the tumultuous times of conflict during the twentieth and the twenty-first century.

What It Takes to Be the Number One Manager in the World: A Book of Revelations

I am a ghost writer.In life, I was the founder of modern management.During my life, I published 39 books including such classics as: Concept of the Corporation (1946), The Practice of Management (1954), The Effective Executive (1967), Management: Tasks, Responsibilities, Practices (1973), Innovation and Entrepreneurship (1985), Post-Capitalist Society (1993), and Management Challenges for the 21st Century (1999).I saw many of the major trends of the 20th century before almost anyone else did: the Hitler-Stalin pact, Japan’s impending rise to economic power, the shift from manufacturing to knowledge work, the increasing importance of the social sector, and the fall of the Soviet Union.I had an incredible impact on managing in turbulent times.To thrive as a manger in turbulent times you must regularly ask of individual businesses their source of legitimate authority, their principle of organization, and their pattern of leadership. You must feel the need to address employees’ concerns for status and function, to fit knowledge workers into established structures of decision making and command, and to achieve effective communication in and among managerial levels. You must take seriously the recruitment and development of executives, the proper role of boards of directors, and the special needs of companies at different stages of development. You must pay adequate attention to the internal logic of work itself and to those techniques by which managers can become both more efficient and more effective. You must always know the nature of the business you are in and the character of the customers your business serves.I distilled leadership into three attributes. The first attribute of effective leadership is working hard, the second is taking responsibility, and the third is earning trust. Trust is the conviction that the leader means what he says. It is a belief in something very old-fashioned: Integrity.

Excel in IT

Corporate world is strange, where many people are stressed, depressed, but still well-dressed. This book is an attempt to understand that strangeness and find humour in that strange world. You now have the red pill and the blue pill. Take the blue pill and continue the peaceful journey with your IT job or take the red pill, read the book and be the “Chosen One”!About the author:Prabhu is a software tech consultant. For almost two decades, he has been field-tested, battle-hardened and shaped-up by the elements of the IT/Software industry. Enlightened by those encounters, he ended up writing this book! His continuing mission - to boldly go where no one has gone before!

Best Children's Animal Picture Book (1)

Every page is crafted to give the reader new types of animal fun! Each picture is carefully selected to wet the appetite for more funny pictures to give the eyes treasures to feast on. Each picture draws you on to more funny animals and the problems, that they can get into! Your child will delite in wanting just one more look with the parent. Enjoy the fun together of sharing each new picture to give fun and delight. Enjoy the giggles together!

I Am Sarge (The Dachshund Escapades Book 1)

“I am Sarge the super dog, named after my Papa Duke, who was a sergeant in the Army—and I am very proud of my special name. I was a scared little puppy when Mama and Daddy adopted me at eight weeks of age, but quite a handsome and intelligent dachshund now.” I’m known as a chow hound extraordinaire, and believe me, I have earned the title! Papa calls me his granddawg, and I know I’ll do great and mighty things someday. Grandma says I’m not only a granddawg, but also a grand dog.Daddy and mama love me, and inside my home is all the warmth, fun, laughter, and love that I could ever want or need. The only thing lacking is people food. I never get enough of that, but don’t blame a dawg for trying. I also do my best to protect them, but Mama says I’m too loud. (Isn’t that the point of barking—to be heard??)Papa thinks like I do, a remarkable ability for a human. So does his buddy, Sellars—both of them are chow hounds like me, and they sometimes sneak me some good food when no one is looking. That makes me feel loved.I have lived through some zany times in this family--I even saved Papa’s life when he was attacked . . . by a fence. Such experiences only seem to happen to Papa. All in all, my humans are tricky to figure out, ‘cause they don’t always say what they mean—but I can handle them. After all, I AM SARGE.A heartwarming tale of family, joy, good food, and unconditional love, Sarge’s story will bring warmth and smiles to readers of all ages.

Don't Shoot the Messenger: Read this Rant Before You Post Your Next Review and Learn How to Write a Useful Online Book Review

Who else enjoys a good rant?Reviews. They can make or break any product. It might seem like they make sense. But quite often they don't.You see, in our modern buying environment we rely on trust signals from others to determine what we buy. This works well when the products have large marketing campaigns behind them since lots of people will buy regardless, and we end up with balance.At the other end of the scale, we have small, independent creators. These small creators don't have vast marketing budgets. So quite often, we live or die on the basis of our reviews.And here's the thing. Unless these creators actively try to game the system, a single bad or even middling review early on, can completely kill our products.So we end up with a slightly perverted system. The public generally benefits from reviews about products produced by large businesses. The sheer scale of their marketing means that any negative reviews are outweighed by the good unless the product is genuinely bad.But the same is not true of reviews about products from small, independent creators without large budgets. In this case, bad reviews early in a product's life can completely kill sales and steal what may be a total gem from it's intended target audience.And what's required to kill a product even if it's exceptional? You might think it's a lot, but nothing could be further from the truth.If you're an author and you're looking for a bit of solidarity in face of the onslaught of unjust bad reviews...Or you're a good person who likes writing reviews but might not realize just how bad an effect that a 3-star review can have...Or even if you just love a good rant...Scroll up and Click the Button to Buy Now!

What If We Ate Like That? (Crazy Animal Kingdoms)

The animal kingdom is weird and wonderful, so it’s fun to imagine what it would be like if humans had the same eating habits. A tarantula will wait for food to walk past its house, then pounce! What if bacon and eggs walked past your front door? Would you jump out and eat it?What if humans could make a web like a spider? Imagine waking up in the morning, and all your favorite foods were dangling on a web? How cool would that be?Some creatures in the animal kingdom catch their food in bizarre ways. What if humans ate like that? It's funny to imagine! If you like to learn weird and crazy things about nature and have a laugh at the same time, then ‘What If We Ate Like That?’ Is the book for you!

Chickens Can't Count (Silly Chickens)

Every chicken knows, don’t count your eggs. So when Pecky tries to count her eggs, it turns the coop upside down. Maybe it is a good idea to count your eggs before they hatch?

Jennifer Has a Plan: 25 Super Hardcore Sex Humiliation and Parody Etotic Stories Bundle

The Hanging Tree1Hogtied at Hogwarts: Slave Girls in the Wizarding World55Secretary79Laura Loghan - Tells it all on TV115what if....152It Was a Dark and Stormy Night..187The Keyholder208Happy Birthday259First Time a Slave290Saturday Afternoon307The Puppet Master334Lord of the Ring Gag360Love by the Numbers397Chastity Debauched - One: Debauched In The Woods425Gold Around One, Two Times Silver Around the Other457Summer at the Beach484Jennifer Has a Plan507Taboo540The Bet562A Strip Searchin' Santa589Penalties619'A Winter Excursion' Ms Howard656The Conspiracy679The Meeting695

Sara's Ultimate Surrender: 20 Super Hardcore Sex Humiliation and Parody Etotic Stories Bundle

ContentsDisobedience1The Essence20Alice's Toy Room69The Dance101Foot Clerks Down Fall126Best Friend's Girl218More then we bargained for243Sara's Ultimate Surrender265Kathy Comes to Dinner283Cum Sponge306MindFucker377Russian Gymnast Becomes A Lili Pod406DIABOLICAL463A Lady's Maid In Montana478Careless Wishes504Lady Jena the Goddess Domme523Bad Boy564Celia's Social Justice592Consequenses of Embezzlement619Kidnap, [email protected], & Snuffing of Donna & Ellen646Owned Toilet Slave664Letter from Wilmington680

Soul Love: A Day In The Life (Soul Love Series)

Seven people, twenty-four hours... shall we get acquainted?From the author of the brilliant "SHOOTING STAR" series, comes a new drama - "SOUL LOVE"Jimmy is out of luck and out of work but he has love in his soul. He's been knocked to the canvas so many times he's lost count, but he refuses to stay down.With friends he can rely on, his trusty camera and a lust for living, Jimmy's life is about to take a detour.Victoria is rich, privileged, and bored. She constantly clashes with her powerful and unloving father. Her mother is distant and self-absorbed. Love, in her aristocratic family, is just another four-letter word. She has everything—apart from the one thing she craves, yet fears, most of all.Advantage and disadvantage are on a collision course. For Jimmy and Victoria, the end is just the beginning.Seven people – one day - because you'll see everything in a different light."This was a fantastic read, I highly recommend it. I love looking at people through Simon Northouse's eyes. He has a great sense of humor with an underlying thread of irony.""Beautifully written, and brimming with realism and humour. This new group of diverse characters has already ensnared me and I am slavering to read the next book in the series.""It’s 1983, a very hard time politically and sociologically in Great Britain. Into this mess of a world, we are introduced to nine memorable characters with snippets of their lives: from the privileged to those financially skint we see them all circle around Jimmy- the photographer. How will their lives change?…for better…for worse…stay the same?""After loving my way through the Shooting Star series, my opinion was that Simon Northouse should be bottled and sold in supermarkets everywhere. I take it back. He should just be sold EVERYWHERE!""The Soul Love series has kicked off with a bang... can barely wait for the follow-up books!"From the author of the successful SHOOTING STAR series, a brand new saga - SOUL LOVE.SOUL LOVE SERIES Prequel: Soul Love – A Day In The LifeBook 1: Love Is The GoalBook 2: Love On A Roll

Funny Jokes: April Compilation (2021 Jokes Compilation Book 1)

Adam Smith returns with a new book full of funny jokes of the April!Every 30 days with a new book, with new jokes, good jokes, best puns, smart jokes for wise guys!Incomparably good, they are beneficial for maintaining a good mood.Whether you read them alone, with friends or family, at home, or on a trip, it will lift your mood and create unforgettable funny feelings!More than 300 new, short, meaningful jokes for those who appreciate fine humor, English humor, or simply like to feel good!Read them today! Be a part of our Laugh World!

The Witch with the Wonky Broomstick

This fully illustrated book is a must-read for kids and grown-ups who never really grew up.Be prepared to hold your nose as the Phantom Pumper strikes again. Stare in awe at the giant snail. Feel for Harry the Rat as he desperately tries to find a friend. And dodge the ogres as they attempt to snotify anyone nearby. Some of the characters are nice. Some aren’t. You decide!The Witch With The Wonky Broomstick is a great book to encourage youth to love poetry.

Boredom Buster Riddles: #Stumped - Volume 4 - For Teens and Adults

Can you solve this riddle featured on the back cover of Boredom Buster Riddles?“I am spelled two ways, but sound alike, I’m used for building or when indifference strikes, stand me up or lay me down, I’m part of structures or when you frown, use me in construction by someone you hire or to describe yourself when you’re sick and tired, What word am I?”This Volume of the #Stumped Riddle Book series features riddles about being stuck at home. Written during the 2020 global pandemic, all the chapters reference things to do or ways to cope with being ‘stuck at home.’It’s also an ideal book for those who need something to do when they’re not feeling well. In fact, if you need to send a friend or a loved one a get well card, write one of these riddles inside. Stuck at Home Riddles features 80 original riddles with each of the eight chapters containing ten riddles. The riddle chapters of the book are; Physical Activity, Relaxation Techniques, Mind Stimulation, Online Learning, Spiritual Work, Games to Play, Things That Cheer You Up, Healthy Choices.Turn the world off with a smile.

Bystander: A Dr Nancy Strong Novel (2)

Bystander is a darkly humorous campus novel in which the characters’ egotistical and competitive relationships are captured through the investigation of a murder. It should appeal to readers who enjoyed the sardonic radio dramas High Table, Lower Orders by Mark Tavener, and the classic novel The Masters by C. P. Snow, as well as readers of David Lodge and Malcolm Bradbury’s campus tales all of which highlighted the often pointless, but nonetheless intriguing, academic rivalries.But there is a mystery too!A student jumps to her death from a window in her hall of residence at Elmhurst University College. Soon after, the body of Madeline Jenkins, head of the Department of Applied Social and Criminal Sciences, is discovered. Both deaths are declared suicides but as the mystery unravels all the evidence points to murder. When Nancy Strong discovers some disturbing papers in an old filing cabinet, explanations have to change and she finds herself on the illusive trail of a psychopathic serial killer. But it looks as though the murderer is very near to home.This story of suicide, murder and academic ambition is the second case for Dr. Nancy Strong, the psychological profiler with particular expertise in understanding sociopaths. For fans of Paula Hawkins, Jo Spain, Alex Michaelides and Angela Marsons this gripping psychological thriller brings together deception, fear and dread all laced with dark humour with ironic twists.

A Book Of Nonsense Verse

"An illustrated treasury of nonsense verse in the spirit of Spike Milligan, exploring subjects as diverse as Martians, hapless animals, unrequited love, Elvis (fat era), fertility and hapless members of the weaker sex." Those people fortunate enough to know Gary Franckeiss, would have undoubtedly had their lives enriched by his witty monologues and wonderful comic timing. For many years, he has privately been writing and secreting away poems of the nonsensical variety, coupled with illustrations, often doodled on scraps of paper. For the very first time, a collection of Gary's work has been compiled for your amusement. Enjoy! Some of the prose in this book is not suitable for minors (and miners). Edited and compiled by James McCarraher. Sarum Publishing, Hayling Island, United Kingdom. IF YOU ENJOYED THIS, THEN CHECK OUT 'A SECOND BOOK OF NONSENSE VERSE' BY GARY, PUBLISHED IN 2013.

Follies of a Navy Chaplain

Connell J. Maguire came to America with his large Irish family from Glenties, County Donegal, when he was 11 years old. He grew up in Philadelphia, attended LaSalle University, aspired to be an actor or a playwright, became a priest, joined the Navy, served as a chaplain in Vietnam and, at the age of 92, still ministers part time to a congregation in Indiantown, Fla. "Follies of a Navy Chaplain" is a collection of charming anecdotes about his childhood in Ireland, coming to America, his colorful siblings, the priesthood, the Navy, Vietnam, and retirement, as well as poetry and a pair of one-act plays.

Emeril Lagasse Everyday 360 Air Fryer Oven Cookbook For Beginners: The Complete Guide of Emeril Lagasse Air Fryer Oven with Easy Tasty Recipes to Air Fry, Bake, Toast, Broil, and More

Emeril Lagasse is all about good eating, and his recipes are based on the region of the country he currently resides in.The main focus of this cookbook is bringing about the idea of good, heart healthy, and calorie efficient food. This Emeril Lagasse Power Air Fryer will change your outlook on how to deep fry food effectively and conveniently at home. You may have deep fryers before. If not, you need one now. The crisp and crunchy, and hygienically cooked finishes are highly satisfying. You will love your new Emeril Lagasse Power Air Fryer. It only takes a few minutes to cook most food.  This book contains the following chapters:BrunchesBeef, Pork & LamFish & SeafoodChicken & PoultryVegan & VegetarianAnd much more!This cookbook is worth reading over and over again. You will enjoy it every time you open it. It is a beautiful piece of royalty.So if you want to know more about Emeril Everyday recipes, grab this book now!

Orange Man Bad

"..Hilarious illustrations, along with witty retellings of the Orange Man's first term.. It's really terrific."- Michael Knowles of The Michael Knowles Show 'Orange Man Bad,' follows the Orange Man's first term, on a quest to find just how BAD this Orange Man really is. A sarcastic retort to the baseless hatred fueled by the leftist, American media, 'Orange Man Bad' brings all the facts in a fun and digestible way that can be enjoyed by anyone on either side of the isle.Don't forget to check out our Redbubble merch shop at https://www.redbubble.com/people/orangemanbadass/shop for official Orange Man Bad merch!!

And the Tail Wagged On (Lost Tower Poetry Book 3)

‘Wag, lick, bark, slobber - the list of Hound habits goes downhill from there but all those little failings are presented here in delightfully diverse ways,’ JSAnd the Tail Wagged On is a wonderful collection of funny dog poems. An ideal collection for dog lovers!It is an exploration into the traumas of dog-human ownership such as the unexpected arrival of a kitten, the ordeal of visiting other dog-owned houses, and the problems that arise when one is always having to show an alleged natural hunting instincts when facing possums, squirrels or other wild animals. And the Tail Wags On features the poetry of - John Aylesworth, D.M. Babbit, Donna Barkman, Rick Blum, Clark Cook, Sharon Cote, Belinda DuPret, Andy Flatt, Stephen Galiani, Marianne Gambaro, Tom Greening, Carol Lynn Grellas, John Grey, Art Heifetz, Sandy Hiortdahl, Lynn F. Hoffman, Ann Howells, Linda Kraus, Stephanie Madan, Indunil Madhusankha, Linda J. Maj, Janet McCann, Jennifer A. McGowan, Beth McKim, Sarah, Frances Moran, Sharon Lask Munson, Antonella Novi, P.J.Reed, Elisavietta Ritchie, Wendy Schmidt, John T. Shillito, Katherine Simmons, Paul M. Strohm, Barbara J. Thomas, Sylvia Riojas Vaughn , John Ward, Mary Wheeler, Dorothy B. Williams, Heidi Willson, Matthew Wilson, Laryssa Wirstiuk, Cigeng Zhang, and Fred Zirm. The Lost Tower Poetry Collection.Lost Tower Publications have created a wonderful, dramatic series of poetry books suitable for every occasion.‘A very valuable piece for anyone's library.’The Poetry of Flowers A beautiful book of poetry in praise of the humble flower and garden.Along The Shore A celebration of the sea and the shore. And The Tail Wagged On A wonderful collection of funny dog poems. An ideal collection for dog lovers!Purrfect Poetry Cat lovers will adore this hilariously entertaining collection of poetry and photographs chronicling the special relationship we have with our feline friends.Greek Fire A sensuous, seductive retelling of the stories of ancient Greece.Beyond The Hill This collection offers a unique slice of world history, recorded for future generations, so they can understand what it was like to live through the tumultuous times of conflict during the twentieth and the twenty-first century.

Dragon Breath

Dragon breath means REALLY bad breath. For a dragon to notice that another dragon has bad breath, it has to be really, really bad! Not just ‘onion-eating’ bad, but more like ‘I accidentally ate a skunk’ bad!See how Char gets rid of his dragon breath in the very funny book- Dragon Breath. A great story time story, or perfect for bedtime!

NEVER MET BUKOWSKI

Poems about growing older,adjusting to lowered expectations and walking in some of the footsteps of Charles Bukowski.

Why Lawyers Suck!: Hacking the Legal System, Part 1

Take the mystery and fear out of dealing with lawyers! * Is your lawyer more interested in taking your money than solving your legal problems? * Does your lawyer forget everything you tell him/her at court? * Is your lawyer unable to give straightforward, simple answers to any question? Stop feeling powerless and at the mercy of lawyers! In this first book of the Hacking the Legal System series, get the inside scoop on why lawyers act the way they do, empowering you to effectively deal with them, saving thousands of dollars in legal fees and avoiding time frustrations and timewasters of lawsuits. This sometimes humorous, sometimes disturbing exposé shares stories of the author’s first terrifying first experiences in a law school classroom, the first time she made a witness cry, the harsh realities of day-to-day lawyering, and why it is easier to invade a small country than file papers in some courthouses. Interspersed are helpful hacks—practical tricks you can use right away to keep lawyers from ruining your life.DO YOU PREFER A MORE POLITICALLY CORRECT TITLE? SEE "LAWYERS DECODED" also available on Amazon.com

How to Get Rich (and then lose it all)

"Strive to understand life. Karma is more than just a Creamy Sauce." Keith David. This is the hilarious account of Keith David, guru and serial entrepreneur in North Wales, who has one aim in life - to get rich and become a millionaire. A tale of his journey along Success Road (and back again), edited by Anwen David, his long-suffering wife. Anwen explains; "The book shows you a very quick way to get rich and an even quicker way to lose it all by being a complete idiot. I reveal the truth behind Keith David and his guide to wealth. The book explains how to avoid making the same silly mistakes Keith does, which includes insulting overweight people, annoying police officers, getting trapped in a cave and winding up journalists."

Pooper

Was Leonard there to flirt with the attractive stranger or just make sure her dog didn't poop on his lawn? (Humor/500 words)

a??Ca??-OXYMORON (Abstract Fantasies, Adages & Thoughts).

This BOOK is made of:- Poem': a literary composition in verse, especially one expressing deep feeling or noble thought in an imaginative way.Spiritual: of the human spirit or soul, not physical or worldly.Spiritualism: the belief that spirits of the dead can and do communicate with the living.Carnal: Of the body or flesh, not spiritual, e.g. Carnal desires.Psalm: a sacred song, especially one of those in the book of Psalms in the Old Testament of the Holy Bible.Anthology: a collection of passages from literature, especially poems.Alliteration: the occurrence of the same letter or sound at the beginning of several words in succession, e.g. sing a song of six pence or I love to love those who choose to love.Myth: a traditional story that embodies popular beliefs or explains a practice, belief or natural phenomenon. A parable, allegory. A fictitious person or thing.Metaphor: the application of a word or phrase to something that it does not apply to literally, in order to indicate a comparison with the literal usage, e.g. the evening of one’s life, food for thought, Peter the Rock.Simile: a figure of speech in which one thing is compared to another, e.g. went through it like a hot knife through butter, he is as hard as rock.Oxymoron: putting together words, which seem to contradict one another, e.g. bittersweet?Eulogy: a speech or piece of writing in praise of a person or thing.Dirge: a slow mournful song, a lamentation for the dead.Euphemism: a mild or roundabout expression substituted for one considered improper or too harsh or blunt, ‘pass away’ is a euphemism for ‘die’.Paradox: a statement etc. That seems to contradict itself or to conflict with common sense but which contains a truth, e.g. ‘more haste, less speed’.Pantheism: the belief that God is everything and everything is God.Parable: a story told to illustrate a moral or spiritual truth.Split infinitive: an infinite with a word or words placed between to and the verb, e.g. to thoroughly understand. Many people dislike this construction and it can usually be avoided e.g. by putting to understand thoroughly.Exaggeration: to making of (a thing or issue) seem larger or more than it really is; with exaggerated courtesy, with excessive courtesy.Evocation: calling up, produce, or inspire (memories, feelings, a response, etc.)Hyperbole: an exaggerated statement that is not meant to be taken literally, e.g. a stack of work a mile high.Fact: something known to have happened or be true or to exist.- Propaganda: publicity intended to spread ideas or information that will persuade or convince people.Fiction: a product of the imagination; an invented story.Onomatopoeia: the formation of words that imitate or suggest what they stand for, e.g. cuckoo, plop, sizzle, chirp, screech, bubble.Omnipotent: having unlimited power or very great power.Omnipresent: present everywhere.Omniscient: knowing everything, having very extensive knowledge.- Om: a mystic syllable considered the most sacred mantra (in Buddhism and Hinduism etc)Chant: a tune to which the words of psalms or other works with irregular rhythm are fitted by singing several syllables or words to the same note; a monotonous song.Verse: a metrical form of composition, as distinct from prose.Prose: written or spoken language not in verse form.Satire: the use of ridicule, irony, or sarcasm in speech or writing.Parody: a comic imitation of a well-known person or literary work or style.Satanism: worship of Satan, using distorted forms of Christian worship.Tautology: saying of the same thing over again in different words.Travesty: an absurd or inferior imitation.Innuendo: an unpleasant insinuation.Craze: a great but often short-lived enthusiasm for something.Dream: a series of pictures or events in a sleeping person’s mind.Vision: the faculty of seeing, sight. Something seen in the imagination or in a dream etc.Visionary: existing only in the imagination...

Max Dout & The Evil Office Mutants Act 1: The Donkey-Boss Rules

We have all dealt with our fair share of bad bosses, but sometimes you come across one or two that really stand out above the rest. Some of these bad bosses have something extra. It’s almost like they were genetically engineered for their evil role in life. My theory, and don’t laugh at me until you hear me out, is that these special bad bosses are evil mutants. Yes, I said it. Mutants. Now give me a chance to explain before you run away from me like I am some type of nut case. So please purchase the book and find out how crazy I am. I promise you won't be disappointed (besides I have to raise enough money to send my kids to college, or at least enough to cover the cost of their text books). Thank you and I hope you enjoy my first book.

The Kaleidoscope Syndrome: An Anthology

The Kaleidoscope Syndrome: An Anthology, is a collection of poetry, short stories, and other literary works by Dave Matthes, author of "The Slut Always Rides Shotgun", "The Passive Aggressors", "In This House, We Lived, and We Died", and "Sleepeth Not, the Bastard".Poetic themes Matthes touches upon include prepubescent grit, suicide, existential acceptance, and abstract variances of spiritual reality in which the whole of society feeds upon, drawing inspiration from Jim Morrsion, Bukowski, and life in general. Included are the opening chapters to one of many scrapped attempts at writing a novel, originally titled "The Kaleidoscope Syndrome", for which this anthology is named after. The last section of this anthology includes the first chapter to the upcoming novel, "The Best Summer of Our Lives", which will be completed and released sometime after Matthes' current novel-in-progress.

I Cana??t Raise Myself: Knowledge Is Learned

I can't Raise Myself a poem by Angela M. Smith and illustrated by Kai R. Smith. This is a very powerful message for parents to reflect on. Kai R. Smith takes you thru images in her life as she expresses the words in the poem thru cartoon illustration of herself. Children will enjoy the words and illustration while sending a message of wisdom to parents who work a lot. Knowledge Is Learned Children's Books. Poetry Speaks.

Tranny's Night Out: 6 Super Hardcore Sex Humiliation and Parody Etotic Stories Bundle

ContentsTranny's Night Out2Vera's Tale51Our Fantasies93The Abducted Bride270The Abduction599Adventures of Jade656

The Ambassador's Wife: 10 Super Hardcore Sex Humiliation and Parody Etotic Stories Bundle

ContentsA Cock For Kali1Adventures of Jade38African Drums166The Agency365All of Ellie410The Ambassador's Wife467An Email To Jennifer513The Apprentice564A Teacher's Past615The Beach Was Never Like This!664

A Caribbean Vacation: 10 Super Hardcore Sex Humiliation and Parody Etotic Stories Bundle

Contents19691A Caribbean Vacation72A Chance to Advance116Ally McSqueal357Alicia Silverstone: Just Like Hollywood388Anna and Her Ball-Boy391Anna Kournikova At Marineland391Catherine Bell Goes Ape391Surprising Carrie391Britney's Ordeal391Britney Spears391